The Married Adventures of Ben & Bethany

I MOVED

2012-01-16T11:41:00.005-05:00

My Dear Readers,

Due to how out-dated "bensrvgirl" name is - I have moved! You can now find me at: www.clutteredadventures.wordpress.com. FOLLOW ME! My blog content won't change - I AM STILL ME!! But, the blog name and layout HAS changed. Change is good; so if you follow on your Google Reader or subscribe via email, change with me.

Bethany

The business of going on dates

2012-01-10T17:16:00.001-05:00

We went on a date. A real one without our little one. It was a first. Let me back up. We've made dating/going on dates a priority from the very beginning of our relationship. It was a weekly priority. It was fun. Then along came baby and we struggled on what to do. I wasn't ready to leave Madden, so we got creative. We made our weekly TV shows our date. We went to the drive-in movie theatre. We celebrated our anniversary. We redefined our priority, but kept US a priority. So last week, I decided it was time to leave our son with his Granna and go on a real date. When I mentioned it to Ben, he said - "we've had real dates." And while he is right, this was needed. Today was the day. It was wonderful. And weird...we both felt we had to be brave. I felt like we were missing something. Ben claimed to go to the restroom, only to come back to report the baby was fine. But overall, it was good. So good. To just be...together, knowing our baby was well taken care of...we came back refreshed. Which is not just good for Ben and I as a couple, but good for Madden too.

Snapshots of Our Life: Camera Phone

2012-01-07T10:51:00.000-05:00

Introducing Madden to his first football.

Helping Dad work. (Oh, and do you see Miko peeking out too? That dog loves a good blanket to bury himself in.)

My little flirt. See that half-smile?

Early Morning Routine. Stare at the windows.

Morning Nap. We both fell asleep.

Madden is still napping away. So I sneak off to the shower, Ben comes in for baby monitoring duty.

Coming Home

2012-01-06T15:12:00.000-05:00

I cried a lot of tears when I was pregnant. Aside from the increased hormones, I spent a lot of time in agony at the thought that when our baby got here, I'd go back to work. I know some mothers have no choice, but to return to work. I know other mothers thrive on being able to work and come home to their babies. I respect those women a lot. But for me...before I had ever held our baby, I knew my heart was to stay with our baby.

For 9 months, Ben encouraged me to trust God with the desire of my heart. With the state of our finances. I wish I could say I did. But I didn't. I gave up. I cried. I made plan B. Plan B: Ben would watch our baby. It was plan B that I advertised to friends, family, and anyone who asked. And I smiled bravely about going back to work and leaving my baby.

The last 2 months, I've enjoyed Madden. Tremendously. I won't lie; being a parent is the hardest, most daunting, but overwhelmingly incredible role I've ever had. Each day, I spent all day, every moment with him. And I wondered: could I actually handle staying home ALL DAY? And at the same token: could I handle being away ALL DAY? I pushed the questions away and focused on the moment: the moments with Ben, the moments with Madden. I cherished them all.

Ben began to realize that juggling school, work and taking care of Madden was too much. And amazingly, we looked over our finances and realized: I could stay home. I was afraid to let hope grow. But today, TODAY, I am happy to announce that I will be staying home to take care of our baby full-time. I am delighted. God is good.

I love this child.

I know I look tired, but I am not...I promise. :)

On Being A Mom

2012-01-05T19:01:00.001-05:00

It is the best job ever.

After nine months of carrying this child in my womb, out he came. Then, I've stood amazed by growth, curiosity, and trust of and comfort from Ben and I of one little baby. It probably goes without saying, but I love being a mom.

I finally get this verse from Luke 2:19 - But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. There are somethings that are too precious for me to share...not just on this blog either. I just want to treasure them, and ponder the wonder all in my heart.

That being said, being a mommy, being a parent is hard, humbling, and life changing. My dad (who has 8 kids) use to say that he was only an expert in parenting of the last age of the youngest (who is now 14). Which means I'm hardly an expert at parenting.

If I were honest, I'd tell you nothing prepared me for being a mom. Nothing. Not being the oldest of 8. Not having babysat for over 10 years. Nothing.

In the short weeks I've been a parent, I've realized my selfishness. My self-centered-ness. If Madden has a need that supersedes mine or Ben's needs or wants.

Marriage helped me mellow out. Not be so uptight. Being a parent helped me relax. Enjoy life. Enjoy laughter. Throw away the controller aspect ( this is a daily process). I've been reminded to enjoy every detail, every second.

Becoming a parent has made me love and cherish Ben more. Watching him with Madden is beautiful. All the things I love about Ben; his silliness, his passion for life, his hardwork - I adore all that and more because he is a dad.

Becoming parents has made our good life better; sure it is challenging and we move slower, but we are richer because of Madden.

Katie Rivers Photography

What's In Your Bag?

2012-01-04T09:00:00.000-05:00

When I took violin lessons as a kid, my teacher was a crazy bag lady. And I was always curious as to WHAT IN THE WORLD she kept in her bags. Well, today, my friend Heather is pulling back the curtains of what a piano teacher carries in her bag. My inner-kid is finally satisfied.

____________________________________________________

Here is my bag for when I teach piano and a list of items from left to right:

Top row: glasses cleaner, glasses, hand sanitizer, chap stick, tissues, a clock to make sure I don't go over our 30 min lessons, a harmony wheel talking about keys, chords and scales, my wallet,

Next row: my keys, stamps, colored pencils for their Theory books, lead refills for mechanical pencils, pencils and pens, an eraser, lisa frank stickers, and our music flash cards and last but not least my bag :)

9 Weeks Old

2012-01-02T09:00:00.000-05:00

Dear Madden,

You are 9 weeks old. You are growing very rapidly. Almost daily, I see something different about you. Let's talk about people in your life -

Your daddy - He loves you. So. Much. He changes diapers like a champ. Still panics when you cry. And, like your mommy, checks to make sure you are breathing a billion times. (You will understand this when you have your own kiddos)

Your grandparents. You have the immense privilege of having very active and involved 3 sets of grandparents and 1 set of great-grandparents. YOU ARE THE FIRST AND CURRENTLY ONLY GRANDCHILD - which makes you very spoiled. You are still too little to realize this, but you have every single one of those grandparents wrapped around your finger.

Your friends - Yes, you have friends! Your friends Graham, Judah, and Caleb. You don't really play with them yet, but we are all looking forward to when you do.

Let's talk about your physical features; depending on which side of the family you ask, you will get different answers. But I can tell you that you definitely favor your daddy when he was a baby. You have my nose and aspects of my face structure. We have found your first tooth. This creeped me out a bit, but there is no denying it - your first tooth is here!

We love you. Tremendously.

5 Things I can't Live Without: Baby Edition

2011-12-30T09:00:00.000-05:00

I am not paid to endorse any of this items, I just REALLY love them and like to spread the word on good products, etc.

When it comes to holding the title "Mommy", I'm still pretty new to this entire new role. But in the last couple of weeks, I have definitely found myself in a lot of appreciation for the following:

Mamaroo - If we are honest, Ben and I originally bought the Mamaroo because it looked like a cool baby gadget to have in the house. HOWEVER, it has become the best investment! Here are some reasons why I love it:
1) Madden lays down in it. Unlike swings which can make a baby's head flop over, the Mamaroo is like a baby hammock.
2) It has different settings for swaying.
3) The little mobile is CLASSICAL PAINTINGS. (This maybe one of my favorite aspects ever!)
4) It has an iPod hook-up.
5) Madden loves it.
6) Customer service is AWESOME! (I follow them on twitter and they ALWAYS respond to me!)

Hygiea Breast Pump - After a lot of research on breast pumps, I went with the Hygiea because it had great reviews (both of ease of use and customer service). The reviews were correct - it is easy to use, and they do have great service. They are also on twitter and they RESPOND to questions/comments!

Social Media Networks - Yes, I can't live without Facebook and Twitter as a new mommy. Why? Because both have given me a lot of wonderful information on breastfeeding, infant growth spurts, etc. (yes, I do listen to my doctor, but I also love to do research on my own to be well-informed). In addition, I have a lot of friends on Facebook who are new moms like me and I love how we learn together!

HoMedics Sound Spa - My mother-in-law gave Madden this sound spa for Christmas and it is MY favorite gift! He finally goes to bed without screaming, crying or me holding him for hours. I love that it offers a combination of "white noise" and a little floating image projected on the ceiling for him to watch. He sleeps and I enjoy some time with Ben.

Baby Trend Stroller Snap 'N Go - We originally bought a different stroller that said it was car seat compatible for all car seats...when we got it, we discovered our carseat DEFINITELY didn't fit. So, some quick research by my mother-in-law (she is so handy!), tracked down this awesome stroller. It is easy to assemble, it holds car seats, it climbs over rocky terrains, it goes shopping, to church, to restaurants, and it fits in the back of the car - it is basically awesome.

Christmas 2011 Report

2011-12-29T09:00:00.000-05:00

We spent our first Christmas with Madden enjoying the day. Simply enjoying every single moment.

We woke up late - a luxury we didn't take for granted...this is probably the LAST Christmas we will get to sleep in!

I watched Ben grin like a fool showing Madden the half-eaten cookies left by Santa.

Madden fell asleep after the 1st toy was opened.

We munched on cinnamon rolls and sausage (breakfast) meatballs the entire day.

We cleaned up puke from overly-excited dogs - a result of their Christmas treats.

We watched basketball.

Ben and I exchanged gifts...this year we tied on who gave who the best gifts. Because you know this is an ANNUAL Competition.

Honestly, I've always heard Christmas is more fun when you become a parent, and IT IS SO TRUE!

His Christmas Outfit.

What's in Your Bag: Diaper Edition

2011-12-28T09:00:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite blogs is written by Erin a mommy to 3 kiddos. I wish she didn't live so far away so we could do playdates and coffee dates!!!

I wish I could say that I am a habitual diaper bag packer, but I can't in good conscience. When I had one baby, I was religious about it. I had everything under the sun packed, ready for all seasons. Then the second one came along and I got less careful about what was in there and threw a little of anything I could find. As the boys got a bit older, and I added a third baby to the pack, it would be amazing if I even left the house with a diaper bag at all.

So here is my slightly different tale of diaper bag contents.

When I'm going on a trip or I'll be away for a long period of time, I use my trusty Petunia Pickle Bottom bag. If you don't have one, I highly reccomend them as they can pack about as much as Mary Poppins suitcase...and a little more!

Most of the time, I carry around what I call a "mommy wristlet". It's got my wallet, and my keys and my phone all compartmentalized because I can't tell you how many times I lose those when I'm with the kids. Then in the small pocket, I carry some tissues and a couple of matchbox cars.

Simple I know, but I find that it does the trick when I'm on the run. I also always try and throw on a dangly necklace when, in case of a toddler meltdown, it can be used as a rattle toy. My kids play with my necklaces for hours.

Mostly, I use my minivan pockets as my diaper bag. In there you will find diapers of all sizes, wipes, granola bars, cookies, an extra hairthing (in case of a fashion emergency) and a thing of bubbles.

For me, keeping kids fed and entertained is my key to survival. If I can do that, I have succeeded. So there you have it. Not your typical diaper bag content, but effective none-the less.

Erin

Twitter, Skip Bayless and WINNING

2011-12-27T22:27:00.001-05:00

Yesterday morning, I woke up with a tweet from Skip Bayless, a sports analyst and Tim Tebow fan on the ESPN show First Take that Ben and I both watch each morning. His tweet said: "Today's contest for prizes based on the answers for #cheerupskip after the Tebow loss."

So, I quickly tweeted: " #cheerupskip when Tebow lost, my husband went to the other men in his life #benandjerry." Then, like a maniac, sat in front of the TV to see if my tweet was read on the show.

I am one of those annoying people that DESPERATELY WANTS TO WIN GIVEAWAYS. Since we've been married, I've won 3 giveaways...ALL from people I know. I've quit trying to win on the Pioneer Woman or any other famous blogger because when my chances are 1 out of 33,000, I figure I have better things to do than be severely disappointed.

About an hour after the First Take show came and went, I checked my twitter and saw that First Take had retweeted MY tweet with the word WINNER attached to it. I got really excited. Then, I realized that in the Twitter world COMPLETE STRANGERS were retweeting my tweet and I got EVEN more excited.

I started screaming. Then laughing maniacally. Then started to do my awkward I JUST WON dance.

My dogs stared. My baby stared. My husband stared. And me? I kept dancing.

Then, I called my dad. No answer.
Then, I called my brother (to reach my dad). No answer.
Then, I called my sister who was eating lunch and couldn't talk..but did congratulate me.
Then, I made Ben call his best friend.
Then, I posted on Facebook.

When my dad called, he shared my joy (though calmer and more dad-like) and asked if I had gotten a direct message with information on how to retrieve my prize.
Then, I hung up on my dad to check. I really need to get out more.

5 minutes later, I did receive a direct message. I really was a winner! Which only brought more dancing, screaming and laughing.

And, what did I win? Just an I (heart) @RealSkipBayless shirt and backpack. The t-shirt looks like this:

Pictures

2011-12-22T09:00:00.000-05:00

You all know that I love to craft and I love lists. Right before Madden was born, I had this grand idea to do a photo book of his first year. Since his birth, I've been snapping pictures left and right. But then, I got overwhelmed. HOW DO I ORGANIZE ALL THESE PHOTOS?

Thankfully, Jasmine Star saved the day. She posted this great blog post and it helped my creative mind get a little more organized. In one afternoon, I organized over 75% of Madden's pictures (still have some to go!)...but wowsers! I feel so much better.

Just in case you are curious, I will be using Shutterfly's photo book option to create his first year. The Folks at Young House Love have a great calendar idea I am contemplating using. Since we have a lot of family for Madden to learn, I also think this is a GREAT idea: The Book of Names and Faces.

Has anyone else done this? How do you organize your pictures? Do you have a fun way to display them?

What's In Your Bag: Diaper Edition

2011-12-21T09:00:00.000-05:00

One of my favorite blogs, On To Baby, has started a new blog post series entitled: What's In Your Diaper Bag? I love this because I feel like it gives me a fresh perspective and gives me an idea of what to include in my own bag as Madden gets older.

That said, I'll share my diaper bag contents...sure, I'm still a newbie at the art of diaper bag packing, but I'm learning the essentials quickly!

From left-to-right:

Top Row:

Diaper Bag
Nursing Cover - one of the best gifts I've received!

Bottom Row:

burp cloth
extra outfit
bib
nursing pads
socks
petroleum jelly (this is a mystery to me why it is here)
Huggies Little Snugglers
Wipes (dont you LOVE the little dino cover?!)
Extra Shirt for me...just in case!

Blog Update

2011-12-20T14:56:00.001-05:00

HELLO! Second blog post of the day. Wow. I am getting a ton of stuff done!

What do you think of the new blog post layout? Easy to read? Can you view it from your phone?

Comments, praises, and criticism wanted.

And he is 7 weeks old!

2011-12-20T09:00:00.001-05:00

I don't think a day goes by that Ben and I hold the baby up to the other and say, "CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW MUCH HE HAS GROWN?!?!"

While it is so exciting to see how Madden is changing, it is startling at how fast he is changing too.

He knows us. Not by voice alone any more, but by sight. That is beautiful.
He gives us the most beautiful, gummy smile around.
We are still changing a million diapers.
We are still dodging spit up.
But we are thankful for both, because it means everything is working just fine.
He is officially wearing 0-3 months.
He needs an outfit change 3-4 times a day. On average.
Speaking of clothes, he hates them. Our child is happiest in only his diaper.
I am afraid to cut his fingernails.
Ben reads to him every night.
He is like his mommy in that he loves to be held, cuddled and touched.
He listens so intently as Ben talks to him. It is adorable to watch this little one hang on every word from his daddy.
We dodged out of the church service for the 1st time because he started crying.
My cousin Leah gave him the only toy that he loves!(at the moment)
He is noisy - he grunts, growls, coos and generally, has a lot to say!

We love being parents.

2 years: Married

2011-12-19T15:50:00.000-05:00

In the midst of our baby/life changing induced haze, we realized our two year wedding anniversary was approaching. We wanted to do something fun. We discussed going to Chattanooga, TN or Greenville, SC. Or staying in town. We debated do we get a babysitter or not?

In the end, we vetoed it all. In light of our love for big celebrations, we went simple instead. We decided to go back to where this all started. We went back to the coffee shop where we had our first date. It was Ben's suggestion, his idea. And I loved it...he KNOWS I love all things sentimental.

2.5 years ago, we were nervous as we met each other for coffee. I rambled on and on about stupid things that he still remembers word-for-word even now. On Saturday, we pushed a stroller into that quaint coffee shop. Over coffee and cookies, we spent time reminiscing...very much in awe, that this time around, we were celebrating marriage. It was fun.

Afterwards, we pressed "pause" on our evening as we changed diapers and fed Madden.

Then, we made our way to the restaurant where we celebrated our engagement with friends and family. We talked, and laughed, and in general, enjoyed opportunity to celebrate.

I've said it before, but I think it should be repeated. I love being married to Ben. He is such a hard working, focused and determined man. He has a big heart. He makes me laugh, hard and frequently. We may fight, but we always strive towards and arrive at reconciliation. We've faced difficulties, but we've learned to overcome them. I am looking forward to the next 60+ years with him.

Milo, Miko and Madden

2011-12-07T10:46:00.002-05:00

Poor Miko (the white one). He still has no idea we have a baby. He thinks HE is the baby. Milo (the black one) really loves Madden. He gets upset when Madden cries.

Wait! He sees the baby! Probably only the 2nd time Miko has realized someone else is in the house. (This was also right before Milo rolled over...on Madden.)

Miko trying to be still. This is nearly impossible since he is constantly moving...hence the blurriness. Both dogs have tried to steal Madden's pacifier at some point...usually, this happens when Madden throws it.

Madden survives Milo and Miko!

Our Christmas Decorating Story

2011-12-06T15:43:00.001-05:00

The reality of our Christmas Decorating Day turned out far different than what we imagined.

We imagined a pristine day (which it was). We imagined Starbucks coffee (which we had). We imagined a cutie kiddo in his stroller as we strolled through the rows of Christmas trees at the local Christmas tree farm (we did stroll and he is a cute kid). We imagined hot chocolate while we decorated our tree (and the hot chocolate was yummy, check out the recipe!).

However, it is as this point our imaginations never imagined what happened next. It all started when Ben asked me if I thought the tree was leaning. I glanced up for a moment. "No, the tree is not leaning." I went back to what I was doing and he went back to what he was doing. 15 minutes later, "Bethany, the tree is definitely leaning." He examined it at the base and decided the bottom limbs needed a little trimming. He asked me to hold the tree. With a baby in one hand, and a tree in another, I held the tree. 20 minutes after he finished trimming, we sat the tree upright and stood back.

This did not fix the tree. I placed the baby in the mama-roo and proceeded to hold the tree upright for the next hour. By this time it is 1am in morning. I'm tired. Ben is tired. It finally looks like it is fixed. So I go to bed. About 30 minutes later, Ben comes to bed, "I took all the ornaments off the tree. It is still going to fall over."

After examining it, Ben determined that the tree is just crooked - naturally. No amount of trimming or adjusting would fix our tree. So, three days after we decorated the tree, undecorated it, tried trimming it and finally just stared at it hoping it would straighten up....we propped it up against the window, stuck some books under the tree stand and declared, "MERRY CHRISTMAS!".

We have a 5 week old

2011-12-05T14:11:00.000-05:00

How did this happen? Where have these short weeks gone?

Madden is 5 weeks old. Let me repeat - 5 weeks old!

He is growing very plump which makes me a happy momma. He has managed to gain weight and since birth has only lost 1 ounce. He has so much personality. He is constantly smiling, or giving funny faces.

He has 1 freckle. His eyes are turning dark which I hope means he will have brown eyes to match his parents. He is not bothered by barking dogs, sounds of the TV or the vacuum cleaner. Madden loves to be held - which is fine by me because I love to hold him! He is working to lift his head by himself and seems just fine with tummy time. He hates, I repeat, HATES dirty diapers; so we are NEVER in doubt of his need of a clean diaper.

When Madden sleeps, it is like watching a mini-Ben. They sleep in the same positions. He sleeps at night in 3-4 hour increments. Which means you are likely to find me on facebook at 4am. We are adjusting to size 1 diapers and 0-3 months clothes. The newborn stage lasted a good 4.5 weeks. Madden loves bath-time something that still surprises me - I thought for sure he wouldn't like it. But I was wrong.

So far, we have braved the grocery store, 2 restaurants, a drive-in movie theater, Christmas Tree farm and church with him. I am still a fan of requiring Haz-Mat suits for visitors, but Ben vetoed that idea...which is why we are actually getting out of the house.

Madden has made our wonderful life even better.

Date Night: Post Baby

2011-12-01T17:37:00.000-05:00

When the third Twilight Movie came out, I really wanted to watch it. Badly. But when the movie came out, I had a two week old baby.

So, Ben and I tried to arrange friends and family to come watch the little one so we could head to the movies. Sickness, holidays and more kept putting a rain-check for that plan.

Until Ben had a brilliant idea. Drive-In Movie Theater. So our first date night took place. We packed up the baby, grabbed some fast food, picked up our favorite movie candy and away we went! It was perfect. We could talk through the movie, take care of the baby AAAANNNDDD we got to watch the movie. Finally.

Throughout the movie, Ben would look at me and say, "Whose idea was this? Who suggested a drive-in movie theater?"

I am looking forward to our next date night.

Dinner Ideas: WANTED

2011-11-28T22:04:00.000-05:00

I have no inspiration for dinner. So I'm asking for help. Basically, I've gotten EXTREMELY bored with food and cooking, so we definitely have the same things over and over again. We need to incorporate more vegetables, but when I go to the produce department of the grocery store, I feel overwhelmed and I stare blankly at all the veggies available.

Here is what we are currently consuming:

Chili
Chicken with vegetables (green beans, broccoli, potatoes - in rotation)
A pasta dish with tomato sauce and green beans or broccoli

HELP ME. Just for the record - Ben hates onions, so I cook without them. Looking forward to seeing your ideas. :)

Thanksgiving 2011

2011-11-24T19:13:00.001-05:00

This was going to be the year. The year Ben and I celebrated Thanksgiving in New York City to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving parade.

This was not the year for that.

Instead, it was the year for baby snuggles. For young parents eating turkey in shifts. For an infant so curious of the festivities, he refused to nap. For 3 generations gathering. Lots of laughter, lots of yummy food. It was a good day.

Was it what we thought it would be? No. Was it sweeter? Absolutely.

Our 3am Morning

2011-11-23T12:57:00.000-05:00

'Twas the day before Thanksgiving and all through the house...
...Slept a baby, a momma and two dogs...
...While the daddy scurried around the house like a mouse.

Then 3am presented its face
And chaos conviently picked up its pace.

Cried the baby for food!
Then a change in the mood...

On the sheets she found poop.
She was definitely thrown for a loop.

She flipped on the light.
Oh! What a sight!

Poop on the floor!
Don't say anymore!

She issued a plea the husband downstairs!
"come help me!"

Up he ran, no steps did he lack!
To the room he arrived and stopped in his tracks.

"Dogs!"

Soon The mess was cleaned...and the baby was fed.
All seemed calm. Til...

Voices she heard outside of the window.
A detour husband took from bed.

To see if the voices were a scam.
BAM!

Outside on the streets, stood CATS!

(this is a true story)

Working Thru Grief

2011-11-19T12:43:00.001-05:00

It has been 5 years since my mom passed away from cancer. This year, all I've been able to reflect on is how far I've come....specifically, how I've processed through my grief. Grief is so different for everyone. What works for me, may not work for everyone else. I am not an expert at all just someone sharing what worked for me.

1. Embracing all the emotions.
Anger. Tears. Laughter. Fear. Abandonment. All these emotions have come at different times. Different moments. I've learned to accept them when they come. It helps me and removes the feeling of drowning.

2. Talking.
Talking about my mom. Talking about my feelings.

3. Counseling.
Going to see a counselor was wonderful. I felt I was given the tools to understand my grief.

4. Support Group.
I joined Students of AMF and the opportunity to meet with others who had experienced loss...specifically loss of a parent, sibling was so beneficial. So invaluable.

5. Community.
My closest friends have never been timid about talking about my mom...or my feelings. It is a true sign of friendship when a subject is not taboo.

6. Difficult Days. Difficult Moments.
I know the days that will be particularly hard. Those are almost easier to handle than the moments. The moments are unpredictable and come suddenly. Preparing for them is impossible, so I have no choice but to embrace.

7. A book.
A lady gave this book to me for my dad. He read it in a day, it took me months. Every sentence was so raw and so aptly described how I felt. The book is "A Grace Disguised".

I've learned that life goes on. And, that I will not live my life feeling handicapped by my loss. Healing does come and for me, Grace brought it.

Nursery Tour

2011-11-15T11:15:00.001-05:00

Where I got what:
Quilt (my creation)
Crib (Not sure of the exact name or brand of crib)
Rug,
Owl riding Bike Art,
Owls reading,
Bedtime Owl Print
Owl with green background (gifted),
Owl painted canvas (custom piece my sister got for me),
Trio Piece (Owls on Tree, Nature Scene, "M" piece)
O is For Owl Art Piece (working to find the link for the seller)

Owl Pillow/Stuffed Animal
Owl Pillow (my creation)
Dresser (bought from a friend)

Me and Sports

2011-11-10T11:59:00.001-05:00

Part of marrying Ben was my accepting what his die-hard love of sports. Specifically, his love for the Atlanta Falcons and the LA Lakers.

The first season I experienced with Ben was...a learning experience for me. One of tolerance. I tolerated his love of sports because I wanted to be with him. I went to the games with him. He even let me bring a book with me.

The second season I experienced with him...I tried to be a little more engaging. I left the book at home when we went to games. I wore the t-shirt. I sat in the living room while he watched the game. I bought him the Madden NFL football video game.

This season, I couldn't go to the games. I was huge and uncomfortable at 6 months pregnant and Ben and I both knew it would be a miserable experience...for both of us. But I followed the game on ESPN to gage Ben's reaction. When the games are away, I watch the games with him. Lately, though, I decided to buy in completely. I want not to just tolerate this aspect of my husband's life, but I want to embrace it. So I watch ESPN talk shows with him. I listen - truly listen- to Ben explain plays to me. I follow sport analysts on twitter. What brought about this change? I don't know. Probably more to do with the fact that I cherish spending time with Ben and this is a great way for me to show him how much I love him.

Which is a good thing, of course. But it is always made better when he quizzes me for players' names from different teams and I rattle them off. And Ben's look of surprise and pride is worth it all.

We became three

2011-11-09T17:56:00.000-05:00

Last week, Ben and I became +1. We became three. This first week, we adjusted to sleep deprivation. We discovered we would survive without help. We discovered we could do this thing called parenthood. Most of all, We stared in wonder at this tiny one...amazed that he is ours.

This week, we have remained astonished by the amount of diapers we've gone through.

The long hours we now keep at night.

We worry. We have learned to be flexible.

More than anything, we have stared in wonder at this tiny one...amazed that he is ours.

We've called the doctor out of concern.

We've sang silly songs. We've read books. We have enjoyed the reality of parenthood.

We have continually stared in wonder at this tiny one...absolutely amazed that he is ours.

Baby A Update: Pregnancy concludes

2011-11-04T18:57:00.000-04:00

My last blog post regarding waiting for Madden was week 37. Technically, I posted that at the BEGINNING of my 38th week...I was running behind and figured it was best to post something, rather than nothing.

The last couple of weeks (last week and this week, in particular), have been a whirlwind. To be honest with you, I'm not ready to share everything quite yet. But, I can summarize:

- This pregnancy has been all about teaching this insane planner to be truly flexible.
- I have learned the importance of giving myself GRACE. Grace to know that while I am my Mother's daughter, I am not under any obligation to do it "her" way.
- At the end of the day, pregnancy presents decisions that must be made and the only ones who can make the best decisions are (for instance) Ben and I.

- Our baby is here! Ben and I are amazed that this child is a product of both of us; and we are enjoying every moment with him.
- All my specific prayer requests were answered concerning the birth and delivery of our son.
- satisfaction over how the entire event (labor and delivery) went.
- It has only been mere days since our son's birth, but I have enjoyed the impact of a deeper partnership in our marriage.
- Watching Ben as a dad. It is heart-melting.
- Infant smiles and facial expressions.

Baby A Update: Week 37

2011-10-24T20:33:00.000-04:00

We are getting near the end! I've mentioned before how surreal this entire process is...but really! In just a few short weeks, this baby who has been long-anticipated is always here!

This week, I experienced:

- Hot-flashes. SO WEIRD. I'm not accustom to getting hot in the middle of the night. Sweating - all the time.

- Still starving. It never ends.

- Celebrating Maternity pictures. Katie Rivers absolutely amazed me.

- We await the arrival of the crib, swing, and breast pump. Let's hope they get here soon! :)

- Ben brings me back to earth and talks me out of haz-mat suits in light of my fears of Madden getting the flu. (I wish I was kidding about that sentence)

- Weird aches, pains and leaks. Let's leave it at that.

- This child's sports clothes collection is growing rapidly - he already owns the following: multiple Atlanta Falcon's outfits, LA Lakers' t-shirt, Georgia Tech onesie and Ohio Buckeye onesie (my best friend is a fan).

- Wonderful pedicures. I love Ben for taking good care of me!

- Decaf Pumpkin Spice Latte. It is only my 4th cup of coffee since I've been pregnant. It was wonderful.

- The end is in sight. And a new beginning awaits.

"If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all."

2011-10-18T19:37:00.000-04:00

Did anyone watch EVER watch the old classic movie "Bambi"? Remember when Thumper's mom says, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." 70 years later and Thumper's mom's words hold SO MUCH wisdom.

During my pregnancy, I've had several comments said to me that I was able to brush off. Even laughed at, even. However, there are some comments that I wonder WHAT IN THE WORLD PROVOKES PEOPLE TO SAY SUCH A THING?

I've had people tell me that I would have a 15 pound baby because my belly is enormous. I've also had people tell me that it seems like I've been pregnant for forever. Every person and stranger who walks into my office makes a comment about my belly - "Wow! You are huge!", "You are breathing heavy, are you okay?"...I've had people tell me they couldn't believe I could still be standing without that baby falling out between my legs.

These are discouraging comments.

Pregnancy has made me feel like my body is foreign to me. I've had changes take place with my body that have made me (even more) self-conscious. In addition, being 37 weeks pregnant, I am sleep-deprived. When I stand up at work, I feel my hips readjust as I walk...it's painful. My feet are swollen ALL the time...and I can't even put them up until the end of a long day of work. The last thing I need is someone to make a "funny" comment.

With all that said, I want to include some blogs of things NOT to say to a pregnant woman. I'm sure MY readers are far more thoughtful than some of the bearers of the comments I've received and the comments in these blogs. So why share this at all? Because it takes thoughtful and caring people LIKE YOU to be aware of these comments. And if you are around your preggo friends and hear these comments, be courageous and say something! Encourage your pregnant friend! Your encouraging comments will reach into the heart of your pregnant friend and could transform her day. Literally.

Pregnancy Etiquette

Things A Pregnant Woman Shouldn't Hear

Baby A Update: Week 36

2011-10-15T08:36:00.000-04:00

If you ask me how much longer I have this week, I will tell you 3.5 weeks. It feels so close, but then so far away too. Sometimes, I even wonder if this pregnancy is real, then the baby kicks and moves around or I get up to use the restroom (for the 1000th time) and I am reminded this is real...the days just seem long right now.

For this week, we have a lot to highlight:

- Ben makes me laugh by:

When I have Braxton Hicks Contractions: He asks me if now is when I'm going to "birth that baby?"
He practices his reaction for when my water breaks. Hysterically funny.
Telling me he is ready for this pregnancy deal to be over. (I think we both are!)

- After months and months of gathering various pieces of art for the nursery, the frames are here and the art is going up this weekend!

- Praying and hoping that Madden doesn't come until my sister arrives. But, he can definitely arrive the 1st day she is here! :)

- Woke up from a dream where it was my firstborn's birthday and I forgot.

- Watching the quilt for the nursery come together. It really is looking AWESOME...and it isn't even finished yet!

- Trying not to forget to buy about 5 packets of Polaroid film for my Polaroid camera for when the baby gets here.

- Swollen feet. And hands. And face. Looking forward to the day where walking isn't uncomfortable and my fingers look normal again and my face isn't puffy.

- Cherishing these last few weeks of Ben and I. I know I've mentioned this before, but as this pregnancy comes to an end, I am reminded by how much our lives will change (for the best, of course!). Yet with the goodness about to be bestowed on us, I am not forgetting or ignoring the goodness these last 2 years of JUST Ben and I have been.

- Craving pancakes. Someone please place a pancake shop right outside my house with endless flavors of pancakes. I can't get enough.

- Determined to cherish every moment with Madden. To enjoy those messy diapers, and spit up stains and sleepless nights because life is short and we only get this time with our baby once. Planning to hold our little one a lot because life is short and we only get this with our baby once. To not hurry his progress...he will walk eventually, throw a ball, play with his friends and eat solid food...all in due time. But to enjoy each moment. All because we only get this time with our baby once.

- Praying for grace to raise our son.

How One Friend's Journey Inspired Me.

2011-10-11T18:54:00.001-04:00

I don't think I am naturally positive. I mean, I prefer a good tragedy over a comedy, and would rather make people cry than laugh. I'm not like my dad who says he is so positive even his blood is B positive.

That isn't me.

But several months ago, I began to notice a change in a friend's facebook statuses. That change went from random statuses just like everyone else on anyone's friend's list...to statuses of thankfulness. She called it the journey towards a changed perspective. Just like a regular creeper, I found myself going to her facebook page each day just to see if she had updated her status and what she was thankful for that day. It felt awkward, I'll admit. We lost touch years ago, so I even got paranoid she would "defriend" me and THEN I WOULD MISS OUT ON HER STATUSES. (She didn't.) What intrigued me was her statuses boasted of nothing glamorous. They were refreshing normal and honest, but always thankful. Always - even down to unfolded laundry and stressful days at work which were reported IN THANKFULNESS. Eventually, the creepiness of my consistent following turned into curiosity. Could I do it? Could I write a status of thankfulness, too? It seemed both incredibly easy and overwhelming. And, should I ask my friend for permission to copy her idea?

Then, I realized I'd never do it if I didn't stop over-analyzing. So I did it. And, I didn't even ask her permission. Then, I did it again. And again.

Only to realize that a status of thankfulness is refreshing...for me. It reminds me how good and full and abundant my life is. How blessed I am. How content I am. And, how happy I am....(which suddenly makes me think I am becoming more like my dad each day.)

Baby A Update: Week 35

2011-10-09T16:13:00.000-04:00

Week 35 came with 2 doctor's appointments; where I found out I am progressing normally. This week also brought other things as well:

- I returned to my college to celebrate homecoming and visit with friends. It was so much fun; but I was acutely aware of how being with friends from college may make me FEEL like a college girl again, but at 9-months pregnant I have to keep in mind how much is too much and know when to stop.

- Sleepless nights continue...making Sunday afternoon naps wonderful.

- Hospital bag ready.

- My pre-baby to-do list continues to shrink. It is ESPECIALLY nice to have thank you notes done! woohoo!

- After the last 7 months of doing MORE than his fair share of the housework, Ben is enjoying the fruits of my nesting.

- My dad orders the "come-home-from-the-hospital-outfit". I know it is a baseball uniform which is significant since ALL my brothers wore a baseball uniform when my parents brought them home.

- For the past couple of weeks, I would think "6 1/2 weeks" left. Now, I'm just rounding down. Which means, this weekend, I've been telling EVERYONE I only have 4 more weeks. Which is true, but is probably a little ahead of myself too.

- I waited my entire pregnancy for the insensitive comments of people...and they came, right at the end. It has been extremely unbelievable the comments I have received and how they have left me feeling embarrassed and uncomfortable.

- Praying this baby comes the week my sister is here. I really want her there.

- Realizing how good life is.

Baby A Update: Week 34

2011-10-01T16:00:00.000-04:00

This week, for whatever reason, it hit me. I'm approximately 6 weeks from meeting our baby. Several people have asked if I am scared of delivery, no, I'm not. But, it definitely seems surreal that Ben and I are about to become parents. These last few weeks of just Ben and I are ones I am cherishing. As life will change (for the best, of course), I am spending a lot of time praying and hoping we don't lose the "us" factor of our family.

This week brought:

- possible candidates job-shadowing to fill in for me at my job. That seemed so weird, but also crazy because I'm SO CLOSE and I will spend these final weeks before Madden gets here training this individual.

- Gagging on my own stomach acid. Is that nasty or what to think about? But it happened and it scared Ben as much as it scared me. I've made adjustments with my sleeping arrangements to avoid that happening again. So far, so good.

- Feeling like my hips creak back into place when I moved. Oh my...it made walking a whole new experience as I waddle to get things adjusted.

- Ben watching me jump into to action (as he calls it). This nesting thing has made me feel a sense of urgency to get EVERYTHING finished. The nursery is becoming more and more organized and I am wrapping up those last minute projects that are STILL hanging over my head.

- We had our maternity pictures taken. It was so much fun and I am so eager to see how they turned out. Now, I can officially start thinking about the newborn pictures.

- Realizing how much Madden loves music. It is so fascinating to feel him wiggle when there is music playing.

- I'm ready. I'm ready to hold our baby and looking forward to embracing the opportunity, responsibility and privilege given to Ben and I to raise our little one.

Baby A Update: Week 33

2011-09-25T21:04:00.000-04:00

It is so hard for me to grasp that our baby will be here in 7 weeks. It seems like time has flown by in one sense...and yet, it feels like I've been pregnant for FOREVER.

This week:

I encountered sharper pains of Braxton Hicks contractions.

I watched my feet (and hands too) start swelling again.

Pregnancy insomnia greeted me warmly...although, I have NOT returned the greeting so well.

I bought pregnancy skinny jeans. I felt silly buying jeans at 8 months pregnant, but it is AMAZING what a pair of skinny jeans will do for a girl. I felt normal. :)

Week 33 is one week I don't want to forget either. It marked the week I realized that for all my calculated planning for preparing for this baby, some things are out of my control.

Ben's Mom threw us a baby shower. We were so overwhelmed by the generosity of friends and family who came to celebrate our little one's arrival.

The weeks are ticking by so quickly....which already have me wishing the next 18 years will crawl by. He isn't even here yet, but we are anxious to cherish every moment with our child.

How I Chose Our Photographer

2011-09-20T20:50:00.000-04:00

Anyone who knows me knows I love photography. My favorite photographers are Jessica Claire and Jasmine Star. I've been following them for years and I love their work. When we found out we were expecting, I went right to work to find the perfect photographer.

My criteria for a photographer is simple:

I want to hear their heart. Basically, I want to spend hours on their blog, because I truly believe that any photographer that is willing to blog their work, is willing to show how they've grown and expanded. (which is why I love Jessica and Jasmine)

I want to know who inspires them in the photography business. Following Jessica and Jasmine has given me a pretty good idea of those well-known photographers. The celebrities in the photography business. That said, I want to who my photographer admires. Who he or she blog-stalks.

They can't be expensive. Okay, to be honest, this is Ben's stipulation, but it definitely makes the pool of photographers THAT MUCH SMALLER when you combine this with my picky-ness.

So with all that in mind, it seems impossible, right? In fact, Ben and I have joked that I should just go into to photography to element my exhaustive search! But, wouldn't you know that my habit of Facebook-stalking my friends paid off when I found my photographer?

My college-friend Melissa got married several months ago and as I was creeping through her pictures...(admit it, we ALL DO IT!)...I fell in love with her photographer, Katie Rivers. Okay, so maybe it was more of Katie's work that I fell in love with, but you get the point. What absolutely sealed the deal for me? Katie LOVES JESSICA CLAIRE. Katie was affordable. AND Katie has an awesome blog.

I was barely 4 months pregnant contacting a photographer for maternity and newborn pictures. Call me crazy...but I know a good thing when I see it. Luckily for me, I DID contact Katie right away, because over the summer, she announced doing weddings exclusively. (Which means that future family photos will start the search ALL over again!)

In just a week, I will meet Katie for the first time when we do our maternity session. I am so excited! Katie has graciously allowed me to send her multiple photographer shots that I've loved, so it has been nice to know how approachable she is.

This is only the beginning, and I cannot wait!

My Autumn Headband

2011-09-19T07:54:00.000-04:00

It all started when I saw this awesome Autumn-inspired garland. My idea expanded when my sister sent me a headband tutorial.

Then it all evolved into this:

All my supplies. I used the cheap-o 34 cent felt at Joanne's. This fabric glue stuff called Tac. And a pattern Ben drew for me. :)

On layer 3, waiting for the fabric glue to dry. It really took no time at all and it was dry enough for the next leaf.

The finished product. A layered leaf headband!

The finished product:

One angle

Another angle

So easy, fun, fast and cheap...AND it gets you in the perfect mood for fall weather and pumpkin spice lattes!

Baby A Update: Week 31 & 32

2011-09-17T12:37:00.000-04:00

Week 31 slipped by without much incident. I have been doing a lot of research on breastfeeding, returning to work and more. It is a lot to process through; but I know that I will feel better prepared and less overwhelmed in the coming weeks if I process through everything now.

The one highlight of Week 31 was: Receiving a text from Ben telling me he just purchased clothing for Madden.

Week 32 started off with talking to my best friend. We haven't seen each other in so long; and it is weird for me to be very pregnant without her here. The entire conversation was the perfect start to my week. Especially, since Braxton Hicks contractions have begun in full swing. Listening to Ben talk to Madden. He has been doing this along, but as we get closer, his conversations start with "Hi Son, it's your Dad." and end with "Love you." These are the moments I want to remember for ever.

The past two weeks have made me so thankful. Here is an update on my pregnancy thankfulness:

Social Media: Twitter and Facebook have become incredible and highly valuable resources for me as I prepare for this baby.

My best friend Stephanie. During our conversation, she told me she felt a special connection/attachment to my baby. I loved hearing that.

Milk. It is the best thing EVER. I have seriously gone through 2 gallons in the last 2.5 weeks. This is an incredible feat; but more than that I CAN'T GET ENOUGH.

Nesting has arrived full force. It is nice to have some energy and FEEL like cleaning everything I encounter.

The countdown to this baby's arrival is now to SINGLE DIGITS. That is so crazy to both Ben and I...But we are SO ready.

What I've Been Up To

2011-09-15T19:48:00.000-04:00

You all know how much I love lists. I ADORE LISTS. So, let's get started on what I've been doing lately.

1. Aside from waiting for these weeks to fly by....I have become steadily addicted to Twitter. I don't tweet as much as I follow and re-tweet and tweet random things...oh, and feel free to follow me.

2. I made a cake. Using this recipe. I put some berries over it and drizzled a little powder-sugar glaze. It was DELICIOUS!

3. We wrapped up watching Bachelor Pad and Big Brother. I definitely need to blog our quirky reasons behind why we watch what.

4. I've become addicted to...my sister's BLOG.

5. It's overwhelming that I'm down to single-digit-weeks. The reality of this - WE ARE HAVING A BABY - is beginning to hit Ben and I. But we are so excited. SO excited.

6. Talking to good friends. So refreshing. So wonderful.

That's me. Are you up to anything fun? Or, what would you like me to blog about?

Remembering: 9/11/2001

2011-09-11T18:55:00.001-04:00

I have spent time on Facebook today reading people's stories. Their little statuses detailing where they were when the attacks on the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and the plane crash in PA occurred. Maybe it is my "friends", but almost everyone was in high school or middle school at the time. Which is so strange to me; that 10 years ago, we - I - were in high school. High school: where our entire lives are before us and all the dreams we dreamed seem possible.

Did 9/11 change that? I'm sure ...in more ways than one.

I have spent today reflecting on how thankful I am for the men and women who serve in our military, our police officers, the bravery of our local fire departments, our first responders.

I have also spent a good bit of time thinking about the children who won't remember, like my baby. The children whose lives were dramatically changed because their parents got up to go to work and never came home. During all the coverage of that horrific day, I remember one story of a little girl who kept begging her mom for something on their way to daycare in New York City. The mom was late for work...in the World Trade Center. But the child kept begging, the mother gave in...and that singular act of giving in to her child saved her life.

And, like everyone else today, I have been thinking about where I was on September 11, 2001...I was 17 years old. My sister and I babysat for a local women's Bible study. We had been doing that for years; once a week for 4 hours. We were homeschooled, so we had the flexibility to babysit in the mornings. That morning, on September 11th, about 45 minutes to an hour into the morning, the mothers traipsed back in. Without a word to my sister or I, they grabbed their kids and went home. I remember looking at my sister as we wondered the same thing: what was going on? Finally, the church secretary came and told us. It didn't seem real, of course. But it was so very real.

There is no denying or ignoring the tragedy of 9/11. I hope that 10 years later, we haven't forgotten the courage, the hope and spirit of overcoming that our Nation embraced in the midst of a horrific event. So much has changed since that fateful Tuesday, but hopefully, those characteristics of courage and hope have not been forgotten.

Baby-Moon

2011-09-06T21:24:00.000-04:00

Ben and I spent Labor Day weekend in Destin, FL. We wanted a pre-baby trip to take place before I got too big and before the baby got here too...(okay, okay, I'm already HUGE, but you hopefully understand what I'm saying!)

The night before we left, I told Ben that I had been watching the weather on weather.com which told me that a little thing called a HURRICANE was heading toward Destin, FL the same weekend as us. Ben's reply: "Honey, there is a ONE PERCENT chance that it will actually rain while we are at the beach."

Well, it actually turned out to be ONE HUNDRED PERCENT rain THE ENTIRE TIME WE WERE THERE.

Aside of the rain, here are some highlights of the weekend:

Restuarants:

Another Broken Egg Cafe: We had breakfast on the first day here. The food was good and plentiful, but we did get our card declined...only because the waitress ran our debit card 9 times! We thankfully caught the mistake, but it was still a little disturbing and definitely overshadowed our experience.

Acme Oyster House: They serve a specialty called "char-grilled oysters"; apparently Ben had them 5 years prior and has been dreaming of them ever since. Honestly, they were so good. But so unique too.

Fudpuckers: You definitely go there more for the experience, than the food. They have a TON of baby alligators that you can feed and hold. I passed on that experience; instead, Ben and I spent our conversation discussing all the signatures and messages of past patrons. The classic ones were "Lucy loves Joe" or "Erica and Jon 4ever"....which led to the great question: how awkward would it be if Lucy and Joe or Erica and Jon are no longer together, but they go BACK with their new significant others and those new significant others see their little message???

Hammerheads/Poppy Seafood Factory: We spent our last night dining at this place. We sat outdoors, under a pavilion listening to the live music and watching the rain fall. The food was good; Ben kept calling the food "REAL seafood".

And the rain kept pouring...Of course, I continued to ask Ben about that ONE PERCENT chance.

Instead of going to the beach, we did the following:

- We got pedicures. Both Ben and I. Honestly, pedicures are one of my favorite things EVER. And, it is so much fun to get a pedicure WITH Ben.

- We spent a considerable amount of time at Barnes and Nobles. I bought a book.

- We slept. A lot. It was blissful.

We did venture to the beach - the few times it wasn't raining - to watch the waves. It was incredible to see how forceful and strong the waves were.

In the end, perhaps it wasn't the most ideal vacation. It rained. And rained. And rained. But, we did have a lot of fun. We enjoyed the slower pace and the forced-ability to rest and relax. Overall, it was wonderful.

PS - Am I the only one to recently hear the term "baby-moon"? I found it hysterical and I have been looking for opportunities to use it.

My Blog and the 1st Day of School

2011-09-01T20:04:00.000-04:00

My friend Michael recently moved to Taiwan. Honestly, just typing that makes me want to go on a long rambling paragraph about how a TON of my friends have moved out of state OR out of the country. But that is for another day...

Anyway, my friend Michael has been one of my most cherished friends for 6 years (Can you believe it, Michael???). We became friends on Move-In Day of college. And we've stayed friends through exams, papers, our mutual struggle to commit to ONE friend group until our senior year, changes in families, getting grown-up jobs, life changes and now this - Michael moves to Taiwan.

This week, Michael asked me to remember him on his first day of class as a teacher. He said he was nervous about getting distracted. That only made me laugh as I consider him one of the most focused and deliberate people I know.

While I am not sure how the rest of the day, I do know that Michael incorporated my recent blog post on Milo and Miko in his class as a visual aid for how to do a blog for an assignment in his class.

I am not just thrilled. I AM ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTED. My BLOG was used on the first day of school...AND MY DOGS WERE MADE FAMOUS TOO!!!!!

Thank you, Michael. You made my day.

(Readers, definitely add Michael's blog to your daily read. I love a good international blog post, especially one from a good friend too!)

Pregnant Without My Mom

2011-08-31T20:41:00.000-04:00

During week 9's update on Baby A, I mentioned missing my mom. And, I left it at that. But, 21 weeks later, I'm ready to pick up that topic again.

As I've progressed through this pregnancy, I've surprised myself with how much I remember my Mom's pregnancies. And yet, at the same token, how much I don't remember. My memory has served me well - helping me remember how she responded to different things...but my lack of memory has also caused much frustration. I remember her cravings (Cherry-limeades from Sonic, for instance), but I can't remember if she just didn't feel well (which makes her seem like superwoman). Thankfully, my Dad has a great memory! He said it best when he said, "I was with her for the 6 years she was pregnant." (8 kids x 9 months = 6 years). So, I've asked him a lot and learned from his memory.

I think about things that she would have made a priority. Like the baby shower hosted for me several weeks ago. She would have definitely been there. Or the fact that all the bedding for Madden's room would have been made by her. Which is probably why I decided to make Madden's blanket. A connection I didn't even make back to her, until a friend of mine asked if that intention was linked to her. After thinking about it, I realized my friend was right - it was definitely linked back to my Mom.

Interestingly enough, I have learned a lot about my unborn child by talking to Cindy, Ben's mom. Listening to her talk about her pregnancy with Ben, I have been able to compare notes to Ben and Madden. The comparisons make me smile because Madden is already like his Dad (but let's hope that he DOES NOT show up 3 weeks late like Ben).

Overall, I have realized how much healing the past 5 years has brought. Sure, I miss my mom. But, I don't feel disabled because she isn't here -I have learned the importance of enjoying life to the fullest...without Mom. I know that seems weird and harsh to say, but it is true. If I remain stuck in the "What if" scenario with my Mom, I will never live life. And, in that, I will truly become crippled by her memory, instead of appreciating my time with her.

Baby A Update: Weeks 28, 29, 30

2011-08-30T17:22:00.004-04:00

Well, today jump-starts WEEK 30! We only have (approximately) 10 weeks left, people!

The last couple of weeks have been so busy as we welcomed the THIRD (and FINAL) trimester. We spent time with family, attended a wedding, and begun the quilt for Madden's nursery.

The hunger has returned in full-force. I thought it was suppose to fall off?

This baby belly keeps getting bigger and bigger. It is truly remarkable. I keep thinking it CAN'T grow any more...right?

I have been doing a lot of research. In particular, newborn photo sessions. I am SUCH a planner, so I like to be very well informed and understand the trends...especially in photography. I have particularly been enjoying the ART of Baby as Art blog. Adorable.

My blog-reading has evolved where I am reading a lot of mommy-blogs. One of my favorites has become Dear Baby Blog.

I am really looking forward to this baby getting here. NOT MUCH LONGER.

Milo and Miko

2011-08-29T14:23:00.001-04:00

It has been a while since I have talked about our lovable duo, Milo amd Miko! Ben and I absolutely love these dogs.

They have become the best of friends...they throw their toys everywhere. They chase each other. They guard our house by peering out the window to growl at anything - the wind, a bug, neighbors.

Miko has really blossomed from that first encounter on the roof. When we first got him, Miko did not what a treat was, he was terrified of anyone outside of Ben and I...and he was malnourished. That has all changed. He is so funny and loves attention!

Milo is our old soul. While he loves to play, he is also so serious. He loves to be anywhere i am. He is smart and learns things quickly.

Oh, how we love our furry boys.

Birthday Celebration

2011-08-28T18:14:00.000-04:00

Today is my birthday! Wahoo! I have had a great day...actually a GREAT weekend. Ben and I have had so much fun.

Friday Night:
- We had dinner with our good friends, Heather and Cameron.
- Then, we went to the movies. The guys saw "A Night in the Dark" and Heather and I saw "The Help".

Saturday:
- Ben and I spent the day lounging at home...watching the Boot Camp of American Ninja Warrior.
- Saturday night, we spent among Kings and Knights, I mean really! We did! At Medieval Times. It was definitely different from anything we had done before...but it was fun!

Sunday:
- After church, we came home, went swimming and watched Chronicles of Narnia. What a great day.

Overall, my birthday has been so fun. I have completely enjoyed extending the celebration for the entire weekend. :)

Being Thankful...for pregnancy

2011-08-25T20:22:00.000-04:00

My mom LOVED being pregnant. Loved it. So when I ran into my Mom's friends last week, they all kept comparing me to her. The truth is that while I am my mother's daughter, I don't love being pregnant like my mom.

In light of that, I have been spending a lot time recently thinking about what makes me thankful while pregnant.

Here is my list:

1. Pre-natal vitamins. I love those little gummies overflowing with goodness. And, they are sooo good for my hair!

2. Feeling my baby move. Absolutely magical.

3. No morning sickness. I'm so grateful this has not been a part of my pregnancy.

4. Healthy baby. So refreshing to know this baby is healthy.

5. Swollen feet. My only "problem" but it means I'm active.

6. Ben. It is wonderful to know that my husband still finds his preggo wife attractive (even when I don't).

7. (approximate) due date. The countdown to single digits is SO VERY CLOSE.

8. I'm excited to meet this child...whose existence was created out of love. That is beautiful.

9. Embarking on the journey of parenthood...with Ben. I am so excited that sharing life with Ben means we this responsibility, joy, and more of parenthood together.

10. Grandparents. I love watching my dad touch my belly to talk to his grandson.

11. Looking forward to being a mom. I am looking forward to replacing midnight bathroom runs with midnight baby duties.

Remembering

2011-08-21T19:41:00.001-04:00

This weekend, we celebrated my sister's marriage to the love of her life, Adam. It was a beautiful ceremony. Full of tears, laughs and a couple so in love.

During the weekend, I heard comments about how fast Lydia and Adam's relationship went (they met, dated, got engaged in a year). Then someone asked me if I could believe Ben and I have almost been married for 2 years. Jokingly, I said, "Yes!" In actuality, it really is a mixture of emotions - on one hand it does seem possible, on another hand it seems impossible. Probably because Ben and I have weathered a lot together during these two years. We've fought. We've struggled financially. We've grown. We've cried. We laughed...a lot. We've apologized. We've learned to be more compassionated - towards each other and other people too. We aren't perfect.

In watching Lydia and Adam get married this weekend, I was reminded by how much better my life is because I'm married to Ben. Im sure that Adam and Lydia quickly discover the sweetness of marriage is each other...and how much better it gets with each passing day. Literally. Regardless of what life throws at them (us).

Baby A Update: Week 27

2011-08-12T20:29:00.000-04:00

To be honest, Week 27 was not kind to me. At all. In fact, it was the roughest week in my pregnancy yet!

Here is a rundown of my not-so-great week:

- Feeling nauseous for 3 days in a row made for a rough start for the week. I know how fortunate I am to BEGIN to feel sick at Week 27, but it still made it rough.

- Meeting a client for the first time and being told that I didn't look pregnant, I just looked chubby. Thank you?

- Being asked out by a man twice my age. It was creepy. HELLOOOOOO! I'm not only happily married, but PREGNANT! Interestingly enough, it reminded me of the story when my Mom was asked out while pregnant with me (ironically, I think she was between 6-7 months pregnant too!).

- Almost getting in a car accident...TWICE in the same night. Neither time was my fault, but that didn't stop me from freaking out.

- Realizing how much life is changing. I'm not talking about life after pregnancy, but I am talking about changes in relationships and friendships BECAUSE I am pregnant, because I am having a child. Pioneering this stage of life is not "fun" when you feel alone. So, this has been such a difficult thing for me to grasp (hopefully, I'm not alone?!?!) and it has caused me to be very emotional.

Ouch. That was a lot of heavy topics. Let me end on a good note:

- Madden is moving MORE THAN EVER. And, I am noticing his reactions to hearing people. Some people he moves according to their voices, but others who are unfamiliar or loud, he grows very still. It makes me laugh so much! (Speaking of noises, the dogs are running around the house chasing each other right now and barking and Madden hasn't stopped moving at the sounds of their shenanigans!)

- He also consistently moves between 10am-9pm. On that schedule, there is NO DOUBT he is definitely Ben's child.

Wreath Update

2011-08-08T21:09:00.000-04:00

Do you remember this wreath?

It went through a little makeover.

What do you think? I'm too cheap to go buy another Styrofoam wreath, so I ripped up my old wreath and created another one. The beautiful thing of it all is that IT DIDN'T COST ME ANYTHING!

Baby A Update: Weeks 24,25, 26

2011-08-07T13:48:00.000-04:00

Man, oh, man...I definitely got behind on blogging. Work is consuming a lot of time, so I need to figure out a way to balance work, Ben and blogging.

Week 24:

Baby Madden moved around SO MUCH I literally felt like I was going to be sick. It probably did not help that I kept imagining a baby swimming around and doing flips.

Google Images

Week 25:

- Madden kept up his (more) active movement; I eventually got use to it..and even though he has consistently been moving since week 15, it has continued to be an adjustment!
- This week, I also had a gentleman approach me (in a gas station!) and proclaim, "You are having a boy!" It was strange; he was a stranger and I'm not accustom to being approached like that.

Week 26:

- I spent this week at training for my job - away from Ben. Whew! I did not like that one single bit!
- I encountered my first night of 3am heartburn/acid reflux. Thank-goodness, I had Smoothie Tums. Not only do they taste better than regular Tums, they are do the job too! I am so thankful that I haven't experienced this throughout my pregnancy.
- Within 24 hours from each other, I had 2 different people tell me that they couldn't believe I was ONLY 6 months pregnant. I wasn't as offended as I (probably) should have been...I took it in stride, mostly because I realize how many times people forget to be considerate.
- We bought the fabric for the blanket/quilt I am planning to make for the nursery. I am SO excited to start this project.

- My friends so graciously hosted a baby shower for me. I was very honored by the shower and their incredible thoughtfulness as well. I am going to do a separate blog post to highlight the shower. I don't want it to get lost!!
- I honestly feel like I'm on the downhill slide. I only have (approximately) 13 weeks left! It so, SO nice to feel like the end is in sight!

Baby A Update: Week 22 & 23

2011-07-17T14:16:00.000-04:00

Week 22:

- Feet swelling. This lovely addition to my pregnancy that I really do have to take it easy. And, that is not easy for me at all! I love to do a lot - hang out, go do new things, etc. While I am still enjoying an active life, I also have become keenly aware that my body begins to scream when enough is enough.

- My sister gave me this custom-made piece of art for Madden's room.

Life of Mars

- After reading my pregnancy book, I grew fearful of constipation. (too much information?) So, I've been chewing away at homemade wheat bread and multi-grain cereal.

Week 23:

- We went shopping for clothes for Madden. One of my goals is to buy clothes for him NOW for next summer. I got this tip from my cousin Crystal who encouraged me to buy clothes ahead of time because it saves money in the end. I have definitely taken this advice seriously and I am becoming so thankful for Crystal's insight and advice. Plus, Ben and I have had a lot of fun buying 6-9 months clothes or 6-12 month clothes.

- Madden gets the hiccups. I am still cracking up feeling and watching him with his hiccups. It is hysterical to me.

- I bought Madden's diaper bag. I have been searching high and low for a fun diaper bag. I originally picked out this awesome Retro bag.

Source: Fudge Banana Swirl

But, Ben vetoed it when he saw the price. So, I continued my search and was able to get a custom-made one!

Two Little Monkeys Shop

Are you surprised I didn't go with owls? Well, I did look for an owl diaper bag, but in the end, it was the dinosaurs that just captured my attention. I also wanted something that Madden could grow into. And, for as much as I love owls, I think he could quickly out-grow owls.

- I feel like my belly is bulging. Which is why my week 22 preggo picture will never surface. I feel like a whale.

New Blogs

2011-07-16T11:42:00.000-04:00

I've been enjoying some new blogs lately. My blog choices are evolving...and I can tell it has something to do with little Madden coming our way.

This week, my friend Tori (check out her blog and Etsy shop!) sent me this awesome blog:

Meet The Dubiens

This fun Mom blogs about all the creative (not to mention inexpensive) crafts she does with her kids. She also highlights some INCREDIBLE lunches for her little ones in Fun Food Friday.

I also frequent Fudge Banana Swirl. This fun blog/website is ran by photographer Chenin Boutwell. My favorite thing about this blog is the variety - recipes, fun books, nursery designs, fun clothing, etc.

Fudge Banana Swirl

I just stumbled upon Sugar and Meringue blog. There is so much goodness on this blog, you just CAN'T read it all in one day!

I have this (not-so-secret) desire to integrate all things vintage into my home. This Mom of 3 (soon-to-be 4!) kiddos does an incredible job. She recently hosted a fun Cake Party. Friends! I might just be stealing this fun idea. I mean, WHO DOESN'T like cake and friends together?!?!?

What have you been reading lately?

A Sneak Peek: Madden's Nursery!

2011-07-04T15:54:00.000-04:00

An update of Madden's Nursery!

We chose gray as the color for the nursery; I wanted a color that was modern, gender-neutral and didn't take away from the other accent colors I plan to use. This was an especially tall order for a color choice since we selected the color before we knew what we were having. The owl theme was also chosen way before we even knew we were pregnant! I've been busy collecting owl things and that has been so fun. Once I do the big display, I will list where we got everything. But, for now, you just get a sneak peek!

Ben painting away! He is almost finished!!

The dresser, the rug, and the various things we've collected/received for Madden.

Another view of the room.

Baby A Update: Weeks 20 & 21

2011-07-03T17:06:00.000-04:00

As a reminder: Baby A & Madden are the same person! I'm just forewarning you if I mix the two up! :)

Week 20:

- We saw Madden move! That was so crazy cool and I loved every second. He is just as active as ever...and while this may seem weird, I can feel a difference as each week passes and he grows bigger.

- I began to collect ideas for the ONE YEAR birthday party. And, halloween costume. Never mind the fact we have one and half years until we even GET TO THAT POINT. I can't help it. I'm so excited.

- I tried to talk to Ben about Christmas card ideas. He refused to discuss that with me. I suppose it appears extreme to discuss Christmas cards...in JUNE.

- Ben discussed with Madden enjoying all things Americana and Apple Pie. I always crack up to watch Ben talk to my belly. It is so precious and Madden just wiggles more and more when he hears Ben's voice.

Week 21:

- Nursery paint project is DONE. Ben did an excellent job and we can begin focusing on art, decor and more. I'll post pictures of the nursery soon.

- Round ligament pain showed up in excellent form. Catching me by surprise and causing me to feel like I was going to pass out. In the end, I really think the heat was bothering me. And, there is nothing like Gatorade to make you feel ALL better.

- Ben's Mom took me shopping for maternity clothes. It was my second trip for maternity clothes, and it signified another step away from my regular clothes (which I'm able to just BARELY squeeze in) to maternity clothes. I had a lot of fun and I enjoyed the time to go shopping with Cindy.

- We bought our first outfit for Madden. Of course, it would be just plan wrong if that purchase wasn't sports related. So, we bought 3 Falcon Onesies for Baby A. I have to admit, they are so precious.

- I emailed my photo-shoot ideas to our Maternity photographer. Granted, we aren't even doing the session until September, but I wanted to send her ideas of what I was thinking before I forgot.

- Oh, and I'm forgetful.

- Almost every conversation with Ben, I talk about how this time NEXT year, we will have a 7 month old, 8 month old, etc. That is a very surreal thought.

Owls and Caterpillars.

2011-06-29T20:38:00.000-04:00

I recently found the following two parties. Oh-my-goodness. I've cannot even get over these two showers.

This baby shower for Jessica Claire. I adore every detail of Jessica's photography, decorating, and more....so I was drooling over this baby shower. And, I guess, you could say the theme had SOMETHING to do with it.

This fun 1st Birthday party idea. I adore any and all Eric Carle's books, so what better way to have a unique party than to create a theme around a favorite beloved book?

Advantages To Having a Boy

2011-06-22T22:09:00.000-04:00

Where The Wild Things Are....on Steriods


Where the Wild Things Are Pinterest

Fudge Banana Swirl

And lastly, this ADORABLE photo session: http://www.ontobaby.com/2011/06/where-the-wild-things-are-cake-smash/

I'm especially in love with the cupcakes.

My mind is brimming with ideas. What's entertaining your noodle-creative brain?

Just Ben and I

2011-06-21T20:06:00.000-04:00

(It's been a while since I've just talked about Ben and I...so here is an update!)

We started this year out with one thought in mind: simplify. We wanted to simplify our life.

We were busy. Too busy. Four jobs between us, two dogs, opposite schedules, coming and going and passing each other every day of the week. And weekends were a foreign concept because we had never had full and consistent weekends together.

So we simplified. In April, our schedules merged to be more similar. Jobs dwindled down, and instead of passing each other, we actually get to spend quality time together.

The result has been...incredible. Really. We have more time to do fun things together. We aren't rushing. We get to rest and rejuvenate together. The impact on our marriage has been amazing. We don't argue as much...and I'm sure it has something to do with the fact that we aren't competing against life for each other.

In the last couple of months, we've taken a mini-trip, planted a garden, gone swimming (a LOT), spent a lot of time with friends, laughed, gone to the movies, tried out fun restaurants...and overall, we have had great conversation.

Being married to Ben makes my life sweeter, fuller and overflowing with laughs.

My Dad

2011-06-19T21:21:00.000-04:00

There are a lot of great dads out there. I'm definitely not going to dispute that. However, I have been overwhelmingly blessed by my dad's influence and impact in my life.

All growing up, my dad was actively involved. He never missed a recital, play performance, swim meet, softball game, homecoming,graduation, wedding, nothing. He missed nothing.

Five-and-half years ago, dad took on the mom role when he became a single parent. My amazement of him has not ceased. By the grace of God, he has done a great job. Truly.

Sometimes, I think others think the lives of my siblings and myself are deficient without my mom. But that isn't true. Dad has picked up both hats of mom and dad and he has worn them well. I'm sure he would say it hasn't been easy. But my respect of my dad has only grown.

To my dad, for all you to see, I say thank you. Thank you for truly, truly, being an incredible father who somehow manages to stay involved in the ever-changing and ever-evolving lives of your children. All eight of them, at that.

Baby A Update: Week 19

2011-06-18T14:07:00.000-04:00

This week could not have gotten here any faster!

Monday: We made cake balls. If you haven't tried them, you need to go to Bakerella and learn all about them!

Tuesday: We continued the working on the cake balls.

Wednesday: Our small group made bets on whether we were having a boy or a girl. The majority said girl, while Ben and one couple said boy. I did not participate - it was more fun watching the entire event! After our small group left, Ben watched me have a meltdown over the cake balls and then, he saved the day.

Thursday: the day we had been waiting for! We almost didn't get the ultrasound because the doctor said their doctor's office air conditioning was out....I was going to go along with the decision to wait a week, but Ben nicely objected and the doctor agreed to go ahead and give the ultrasound.

We are very excited to announce Baby A is a: BOY!
My favorite part of finding out what we were having was watching Ben throw a fist pump and say, "It's time to go buy a baseball glove!"

When we announced it to our family, we gave out our little treats we had been working so hard on:

Owl Cake Ball with a blue bowtie!

A lot of people have asked if we have a name picked out. In fact, within 30 minutes of us finding out we were having a boy, Ben asked me if I would continue to call our Baby A on the blog, or just announce the name? Well, I can't guarantee I won't continue to call him Baby A, but I might as well announce the name: Madden Gideon.

Now, we can begin the countdown for the maternity pictures!

Baby A Update: Week 17 and 18

2011-06-12T17:54:00.000-04:00

Week 17 and 18 have been a blur, really. I'm sure that has something to do with the countdown for "Discover-Baby-A's-Gender-Day". We are just a tad bit excited.

For Week 17 and 18, we did several fun things:

- Ben painted the baby room. I'm not going to talk too much about this because I plan to do a bigger post about decorating the nursery later. But, I will say the color is better than I ever could have imagined.

- We were asked: Is the heartbeat fast or slow? Apparently, you can tell the sex of the baby if you can tell whether it is fast or slow. We have noticed. We just like to hear the heartbeat. I will say that I think these wives' tales are hilarious. I think this is the third or fourth one I've been told so far and I can't wait to see if they are all right or wrong!

- A mild case of acid reflux has set in. It isn't too bad, which I'm thankful for, but it is definitely enough to notice it.

- The tears. Oh, the tears. I cry about the most random stuff. I thought the waterworks were suppose to happen in the 1st trimester? I guess not. Either way, there is nothing like crying over Man vs. Food.

- The change in my body. Most days, I just feel like I'm all stomach. Other days, I notice my feet swelling, my fingers swelling and in general, I feel blah.

- The controversy. I've become acutely aware of the controversy surrounding: breastfeeding vs. bottle feeding, cloth diapers vs. disposable diapers, all-natural birth vs. epidurals, stay-at-home mom vs. working mom, finding out the baby's gender or not finding out, etc. As these subjects come up, I have been reminded over and over again that these decisions are intensely personal. And, that really there are no right and wrong decisions because they are so very personal and must work for the individual family. In thinking of the personal decisions, I have also become aware of how others can take your decision(s) as judgmental or criticize you for not selecting the "right" decision. This is has become one (large) way pregnancy has become extremely uncomfortable and at times, hurtful for me.

- Feeling Baby A move around. This is so fascinating to me. It is strange to feel life moving inside of me, but it is so fun too. Ben is able to feel it more and more, which has been extra fun. The only downside, is that quite OFTEN, Baby A starts to squirm around at 11pm. This is NOT GOOD NEWS. Sure, I'm doing the nursery in owls, but that was absolutely NOT an invitation for Baby A to become a night owl!

- Ben has been practicing how to properly hold a newborn baby. Thankfully, Miko is the perfect candidate to practice!! Ben is doing a great job, and I think he will have no problems at all when Baby A gets here.

- A special note for Baby A: It is really hard for us to believe you will be here in about 4.5 months. We are excited, but nervous too. While you will come to us as a tiny baby, the responsibility for you is huge. We don't take this lightly. Continue your little growing!

Outdoor Inspiration

2011-06-05T22:53:00.000-04:00

Now that Ben and I have a real front porch and an actual backyard, I have been dreaming and drooling over outdoor furniture.

For the front porch, I was dreaming up these pretties:

Thank you, Google Images

Of course, I'd want red. One, because I am obsessed with that color. And, two, to pay homage to Ben's favorite NFL team, the Atlanta Falcons (who may or may not be playing this year, but that is another blog post).

For the backyard area, I was thinking of something like this:

Thank you, Google Images

My Grandmother had one of these at her house, and any time I see one, I think of her.

But then, I found this post on my newest favorite blog. Now, I'm dreaming about wooden pallets and tarps. Never mind the fact that I don't have a clue how I'll get it in my car, I want to make an outdoor lounging area SO much!

Why I Love Handmade & Etsy

2011-06-04T08:27:00.000-04:00

I've been wanting to blog about why I love handmade items, and specifically, Etsy items. I could easily sum it up by saying: One of my favorite things is to purchase handmade/uniquely made things from the direct artist. While that is true, there is more to it.

I Love Unique
Don't get me wrong, for as much as I love Target and shopping at other big name stores, I love purchasing unique things. That's why my goal for decorating my house is that each decorating item by handmade/homemade by me or someone I know. This includes knick knacks and all art pieces. Aside from a couple of pieces, I've managed to do this. The result is incredible. For one, I never have to worry that someone will walk into my home and say, "I've got the exact same piece at my home!". Plus, it provides a lot of great conversation starters (Like the art piece that was a custom-made wedding present for a friend of mine...that now sits in my home!).

The decision: Make it myself or Not?
A couple of months ago, I purchased a crocheted hat for a baby shower gift. While everyone thought I had made the hat, and could easily do so, I love being able to support these artists who, for many, make their living creating items (toys, hats, art, etc). The result of this is that I can see the pride of the artist and their strive towards excellence. (With the exception of one item for Baby A's room, I have been pleased beyond words by what I've selected for my entire home).

Handmade...Quality?
I know it seems (almost) like an oxymoron - handmade quality. But, my love for Etsy shops and my belief in purchasing handmade has only grown by the exceptional quality of product I have received. Like I mentioned before, with the exception of ONE piece, every item I've bought has been a superior product. Plus, I've noticed that part of an artist's strive for excellence is how the item is packaged. A lot of times, I'm not opening JUST a box, I'm opening something that not only is beautifully made, but beautifully packaged. It makes the experience that much more special.

Commissioning Artists
I'm cheap. Really, I am. ( I love beautiful things, but my budget doesn't allow me to throw caution to the wind) When it comes to art, in particular, I have a consistent dollar amount I won't go over. That said, it takes time to find what I want. Which is fine with me - I'm patient. However, if there is an artist whose work I really love, I'm not afraid to stuff my money in mattresses to save to buy what I want.

Using Etsy for Inspiration
I'm not against this because I do it all the time, but I think this comes with a good balance. It's one thing to see something and figure out how to make it for yourself. It's a completely different thing to do that, and never support the sellers on Etsy. Like I mentioned before, this is how a lot of the Etsy sellers pay their bills. So, be selective in your inspiration, but don't be afraid to purchase either. Etsy crafts itself around inspiring people to be creative, to embrace the homemade, so be wise when you select what you can make for yourself and what you can purchase for the principle of supporting someone's craft.

This has turned into a fairly serious blog, but it is certainly a topic I really believe in. What are your thoughts? Do you buy handmade? Share away, I'm eager to hear your thoughts.

Start shopping at: www.etsy.com!
Etsy has no idea who I am; this blog was not for advertising purposes in which I benefited, it's simply because I love Etsy products, and want to share them with you.

Baby A Update: Weeks 16

2011-05-30T20:00:00.001-04:00

Dear Baby A,

16 weeks. We are 4 months along, which in my mind, is PRACTICALLY the halfway point. This week, we celebrate:

- 3 weeks before we find out what you are. I. CANNOT. WAIT.

- I was told I looked 10 years old. While that was so very weird since I'm pregnant, that could be lucky for you. Let's hope you inherit my eternal-youth genes.

- We bought the paint for your room. It's the perfect GRAY COLOR.

- Your Dad felt you move. FINALLY. I've been feeling you wiggle around for the last week or so, but it was SO cool to watch him feel you. You aren't thumping on the walls of my stomach, so it feels more like air bubbles rumbling through my stomach.

- We've become obsessed with Angry Birds. Sure, I know this has NOTHING to do with you, but I want to make sure we don't forget this important event.

- I bought Maternity Clothes. Finally. My pants wouldn't buckle. It was time. Thank-goodness, for my friend Heather for tagging along. I had a lot (more) fun with Heather being there!

- Ben surprised me by making sure that Milo and Miko are getting excited for you. He bought this cute little toy for them (now, I'm worried they might try to eat ANY owl they see.)

Memorial Day 2011: Part 1 (Rest)

2011-05-30T19:38:00.000-04:00

I've been looking forward to this weekend for so many reasons. For one, I needed a break. A chance to rest - fully - and recover. Pregnancy is not kind to a woman's body. In my case, I've endured aching joints, uncomfortable, restless nights, and the over-all continual exhaustion. My job which averages 45+ hours a week leaves me with little energy to do much less.

So this weekend was welcomed with wide open arms. The chance to rest for 3 days and what's better, a chance to rest with Ben.

It started off with a one-hour massage Ben had arranged for me. It was glorious. For the first time in YEARS, I felt the tension of stress, the discomfort of pregnancy melt away. I slept harder that night then I had in a very long time.

The next day, I actually had a lot of energy to enjoy the day Ben and I had planned out....but that fun event will come in the blog post or two!

Baby A Update: Week 15

2011-05-21T08:05:00.000-04:00

A lot happened this week, so I want to be sure to not miss this week's update.

Baby Registry:
We have begun the baby registry process. While it is a lot of fun, it is also a good dose of reality of what we will be undertaking in 5 months. The completion of the baby registry will take a month and a 3-step process. We will go to 2 stores, but then the 3rd process will be coming back to get more gender-specific items and make our decisions on big things like car-seats, strollers, and cribs. So, what do you think is the best of those big items? We want something that will last, so share away.

I fell...off the bed:
This was a weird event. Mainly because neither Ben nor I are sure how it happened. One moment, I was sitting on the bed playing with Milo. The next moment, I was falling off the bed. Thankfully, I landed on my butt, so I was fine, but a little scared. Ben's concern was (probably) greater than mine; I wasn't bleeding, so I knew I was fine, but he was still worried. And, poor Milo was so upset. I think he felt it was his fault (but it wasn't).

This is a great segue into Week 15's Doctor's Appointment:
Ben told me he was nervous to hear the baby's heartbeat after my night-before fall. But all was well, and we heard Baby A's heartbeat.
They took blood to check for genetic disorders such as down syndrome and spina-bifida. While Ben and I didn't really discuss this much afterwards, I think it hit us both that either one of these "disorders" could be in our future with Baby A. I do know we discussed it enough to know that no matter what, this is our child, and we will adjust and love Baby A regardless of what the future holds.
In other news, we are four weeks away from finding out if Baby A is a boy or a girl. We are SO excited.

Art of being (un?)Comfortable:
As this pregnancy progresses, I am quickly becoming more and more uncomfortable. One night this week, I woke up around 1am to Ben saying, "you really need a body pillow." I think he realized that I was trying hard to get comfortable and it was not working.
Aside from my struggle to get comfortable at night, I am also dealing with random aches and pains of my hips, stomach, and legs and my feet are beginning to swell ever-so-slightly. My doctor says its all normal, but I don't feel normal.
Lastly, I have resisted Maternity clothes for 15 weeks. But I knew the end of this resistance was in sight, when my pants wouldn't buckle, and I'm running out of clothes that actually fit.

This week's cravings:
Hip-Hip-Hooray! for pickles....and strawberries.
(for all who have wondered, I am not craving pickles and ice-cream!)

Note to Baby A:
The more that arrives for your nursery, the more excited I get for YOU to get here. We are 25 weeks away. It seems like a long time to wait, but I have established several mile-markers that help break up all those weeks.
- We find out if your gender. June 2011
- Your Dad runs a 10K. July 2011
- Your Aunt Lydia gets married. August 2011
- We take maternity pictures. September 2011.
- Your dad takes on his first triathlon. October 2011.
When I consider all those events, your arrival doesn't seem so far away. We are thrilled and anticipating the day, you are in our arms. We KNOW you will be one spoiled baby. And, that is okay. We only get these moments with you once.

[Untitled]

2011-05-16T20:46:00.002-04:00

Dear Blog,

In college, I was never bored. Never without company. Never without conversation. During the course of my 4 years of higher academic pursuit, I was never without friends. This was a big deal to me. I love people. I crave that interaction - that face-to-face conversation, the hours spent in someone's company. I am a people person.

But more than that, I had experienced the intense feelings of loneliness before. Pre-college, I spent a lot of time by myself. Wanting friends and wondering what was wrong with me? There were too many tears, too many unanswered questions and too many promises to myself: Just get through this and never gain. I promise.

Post-college, I learned the value of being alone. Enjoying "me" time. This is something I was once afraid of, but now I cherish it. I don't need it a lot or often, but I enjoy it when I get it.

Lately, however, I find those pre-college feelings creeping up. I'm walking down an all-too-familiar and all-too-dreaded road. I'm lonely again. Yet, now, I find myself beginning to be discouraged. My lack of quality interaction, conversation and people investment, leaves me sad and paranoid. Sad because I love people and I love to hang out with friends. Paranoid because I can't help but wonder if it is me. Have I cut people off? Do I not seem welcoming? Friendly? Those promises of long ago seem unreal: Once again.

I don't like to seem like a sad-face with this blog. But, sometimes, I feel like I HAVE to be honest with you all. My life isn't always full of fun and happiness and sunshine (although, I TRY SO VERY HARD!!), and while I am happy with my life, I do struggle. And, this is an area of my life that I am struggling with right now.

Thank you for listening.

Baby A Update: Weeks 13 & 14

2011-05-14T08:00:00.001-04:00

Week 13:

- I celebrated Mother's Day for the first time in 5 years.
- Ben suprised me with a 1 hour massage and tickets to see Bruno Mars in concert.
- My friend Stephanie sent me the best card reminding me that she hadn't forgotten how hard Mother's Day has been. It reminded me of all those Mother's Days I spent with her in college, and it made me so thankful for her friendship (again).
- I consumed a jar of pickles in a week. It was wonderful.
- I wore my only maternity outfit. It's basically a maxi-dress made out of jersey cotton. I don't care. It is comfortable and it fits.

Week 14:

- I bought several items for Baby A's nursery. Ben and I contemplated what color to paint the nursery (I vote gray - regardless of Baby A's gender).
- We left the Bruno Mars concert before the first song finished. The music was too loud and I was terrified of it negatively affecting Baby A. Then, I cried the rest of the evening. 1) Knowing I had made the right decision. 2) Having a hard time coming up with fun things to do while pregnant (that don't involve shopping or eating)....suggestions are welcome.
- My baby bump arrived. Thank you, Baby A, for deciding not to truly show yourself 'til after we were out of the 1st trimester. Your mother thanks you.
- Ben waking me up in the middle of the night as he pulled me closer to him, then having him place his hand on my stomach. At 3am, Baby A, he was trying to feel you move. Grow big; your dad wants to feel and see you wiggle inside my tummy.
- Just so you know, Baby A, a lot of people have made a couple of the following remarks:
- "Maybe Ben will grow up now that he is about to be a Dad." I love that Ben is goofy and so entertaining. I am sure this will be a trait you also will love about your dad. And, I'm sure will inherit his silliness too. It will make for a lot of funny and silly memories.
- "Get all the sleep you can now." This is also an inaccurate statement. I am already LOSING sleep because my pregnant body. I see this as preparation for the future when Baby A is finally here.
- "You will have to get rid of the dogs." I want you to grow up around animals. I think this is so important for you, Baby A, to learn how to be gentle and love our furry friends. So, unless you are deathly allergic to them, or they show signs of aggression towards you...Milo and Miko will be apart of your life.

Lastly, this is FOR YOU, my readers. I want your votes: What do you think Baby A is? A boy or a girl? Leave your comments in the comment box. We find out in a couple of weeks, but I want to be able to include your input in the baby scrapbook I plan to make. If you are "anonymous", put your name in the comment box so I know!

The Beginning: Making Dreams Come Alive

2011-05-13T22:19:00.000-04:00

As the oldest sibling, I am not accustom to be confronted by my younger siblings. But, last weekend, that is exactly what occurred.

My brother, JohnMark, is almost 16 years old. He is funny, but also very philosophical. So, when he popped up on facebook chat and said he had a question for me....I honestly thought it would be about something silly (like girls) or something deep (like politics).

Turns out, it was neither. It had to do with me.

He said: "Now that Ben is pursuing his dreams [Ben is in school, but also running his own business], when are you going to start pursuing yours?"
I'll admit. I was very confused by this. "What do you mean?"
"You love to write." He replied. "But you don't do anything with that love."
He paused for a moment before continuing. "Some of my best childhood memories were listening to the stories you use to tell. You've talked about writing them down, and making them into something. But you haven't. And, now Baby A is on the way. More than that, I want my kids to know about Mongo."
I was stunned by his statement.
Mongo is this character I created in which I crafted multiple stories surround the adventures with Mongo and told the stories to my siblings. Always a new story, a new adventure, and unbeknown to me, I was crafting memories that would play vital part of my siblings' lives. Who knew?

I love writing. I really do. It challenges me, it relaxes me, and honestly, I love having an audience to share with too. This is why I love my blog so much. I have so much fun doing something I love. Truly, truly love. Yet, JohnMark sparked an old flame in my writing soul. He reminded me of my dreams, my fears, my hopes. More than that, he made me realize what an opportunity I have to craft my passion into art to be enjoyed by others.

With that in mind, I plan to do something I've never had the courage to do: put Mongo on paper. Recount the stories, and begin to pursue this dream.

Mother's Day 2011

2011-05-08T20:27:00.000-04:00

Duchess.

That's what she wanted to be called. In my 16 year old mind, I thought it was so weird to listen to my Mom discuss what she wanted her grandkids to call her. But I also knew it was so like my Mom as well.

10 years later, 5 years since she has been gone and 6 months away from her first grandchild making his/her entrance in the world, that name seems so real to the woman I'm remembering. It seems strange for me to realize that my child will never know their grandmother - the personality that would have brought the name Duchess to life with all the elegance, fun and more. Try as I might, Duchess will be a foreign name to Baby A.

I was discussing this with a friend of mine recently and she reminded me that Baby A will see my Mom's influence through the way I raise him/her. Isn't that both fascinating and startling? That all though Baby A will never know my Mom or even recognize her thumbprints in my life, the influence will be there.

To all the Moms out there - Happy Mother's Day. You are loved. Greatly.

Baby A Update: Weeks 11 AND 12

2011-05-02T21:33:00.000-04:00

Dear Baby A,

Well, congratulations to you! You are now 3 months along and you are movin' and grovin' right along. It will be a couple more weeks before I'll be able to actually feel you, but I'm excited for that day to come. You might actually convince that this entire pregnancy thing is not a joke. *wink*

Over the last couple of weeks, your rapid development and growth has completely sucked all the energy right out of me. I was sleeping 13 hours a night EVERY SINGLE NIGHT and still felt like I need just 7-8 more hours. It was rough. But, the recovery is on its way and I finally feel like a normal person.

I've noticed a couple of things I want to be sure to remember. A couple of things I want to make SURE you know about:

Apparently, you make people feel invincible. Your grandfather told me he didn't need to get out of the tornado weather - After all, HE WAS GOING TO BE A GRANDFATHER.

You also give people the desire to celebrate Mother's Day. This will be the first Mother's Day in 5 years that my family will actually celebrate it. And, Baby A is going to be the star of that day for making me a "Mom-to-be". (How weird is that?!?!)

Your little library is quickly growing. And, your mother could not be more thrilled. WHO DOES NOT LOVE CLASSIC GOLDEN BOOKS?!?!?! You can thank your Grandma-Tina for that.

I had a lady dangle my necklace over my stomach and announce that I was having a girl. Boy or girl, we are excited to see you. We know you will be just a gorgeous baby. I mean, LOOK AT YOUR PARENTS!!!

There is nothing more magical, more incredible then hearing your little heart pounding away. Keep on keepin' on! You, Baby A, are 6 months away from making your grand entrance.

Feeling Like Home

2011-04-14T08:00:00.001-04:00

It's amazing how nice it is to finally relax.

March was stressful. I'm not sure why, but I think it has to do with a lot of activity took place in March. And, all that activity left me plum-worn out. For real. As excited as we are that Baby A is on his/her way, that announcement left us overwhelmed and stressed out. You know the entire: HOW ARE WE GOING TO PAY FOR A BABY? As a planner, all this hit me hard.

The reality is that life throws stuff at you when you are never ready or never prepared. At ALL.

So, between our baby announcement, two siblings' announcing their engagements, and our move, I was exhausted. I had no motivation at all. In fact, I was relieved to pack up my sewing machine. What's more, I didn't want to craft anything or sew or read or cook or bake. And, those are all some of my most favorite things to do. All I wanted was to settle down and settle in. To our new home.

And, settle we did. Thank goodness. We've established a place of rest, dreams and potential. I'm excited. But, more importantly, I'm relieved to finally feel like I can relax.

How do you relax?

My Wreath

2011-04-13T20:00:00.003-04:00

I mentioned my wreath yesterday, but here is the finished product. It took me about 1 hour and only $7. Now that is a deal!

I think Spring is finally here!

I Make Things

2011-04-12T08:00:00.000-04:00

With the move behind and all the boxes and things unpacked and organized, my creative juices are once again buzzing about. I am currently working on this Yarn Wreath I saw several months ago and fell in love! Mine is still in the works, but I'll post a picture once it is all finished.

Another project I am looking forward to is creating a Mixed Media Art piece for the master bedroom. Anyone who has visited my home has been subject to my complaining over the lack of art and color in our bedroom. I have finally decided to try my hand out Mixed Media. I'll be honest, the entire concept is a little mind-boggling because I get stuck on the entire what "mixed medias" to use. I know I am using paint, newspaper, construction paper/ scrapbook paper, but beyond that - I DON'T KNOW. If any of you have tackled a similar project, LET ME KNOW, PLEASE!

A couple of weeks ago, I decorated for a friend's baby shower. Her little boy is on the way and we did the theme of a little red wagon.

Thank you, Google Images.

It was a lot of fun trying to come up with decorations, but the trick is to decorate spending very little money. I think, including the flatware, dishes, tablecloths and decorations - I spent about $34. While I am sure I could have cut MORE corners, I love expensive things (remember, my dad told Ben, that I have "a champagne taste on a beer budget"?), so this was a major accomplishment.

Table Display. (The blocks say, "It's A Boy!")

Ben definitely gets ALL the credit for making each triangle. I didn't feel good the night before, so he did it for me. I love him.

I am excited for what I'll be making in the next couple of weeks (shower curtain, art piece, etc.). Have you made anything recently?

Baby A; Week 10

2011-04-11T20:00:00.000-04:00

This weekly update is late. I know, I know - all I have for you are excuses! But, please, accept them. Okay?? Being pregnant - especially at this stage of my pregnancy - is EXHAUSTING. I seriously want to sleep all the time. Oh, and, I'm always too tired to do anything. Literally, ANYTHING.

So, this week:

Baby A, according to my handy-dandy preggo book, moves from embryo to fetus. Congratulations Baby A on this GRAND accomplishment! Keep up the great growing!

Ben, once again, exceeded my hopes and dreams and expectations, by unpacking EVERY SINGLE box. And, if that wasn't enough, he also organized everything. He is precious and I am so thankful for him.

Ben also has graciously started the (regular) craving runs. Poor man. His hands are full with those!

And, lastly, Ben has (perhaps begrudgingly?) also cleaned up any and all doggy-poop. The sight of it makes me want to vomit.

I am extremely fortune to have a husband who goes above and beyond anything that I may ask of him...or not ask of him. Daily, I realized how lucky and spoiled I am to be married to Ben. And, you know what? I wouldn't trade it for the world!

The Parent Brain: I know Ben and I are FAR from being fully immersed in the role of parent. However, I think it is safe to say we are both beginning to notice children and babies more. And, the other day, Ben told me his reaction when a friend mentioned wanting to get a vulgar bumper sticker. Ben said he told his friend, "What happens when a little girl asks her dad what that means? Why would you do that?" This is one of my favorite stories because it shows how Ben's thought process is beginning to change toward our pending new role.

There are a lot of decision to be made: finalizing names, deciding on WHERE to register, processing through decisions regarding the birth, etc. There are a LOT of decisions to be made. But, Ben and I are taking it in strides and addressing each decision at the appropriate time.

News Flash: We Moved

2011-04-10T20:09:00.000-04:00

I am THRILLED to announce we MOVED! And, it is only fitting that I announce it here as my blog has seen Ben and I go from RV living to Apartment living to now a little home! So, we moved and it all took place a week ago, actually. It all started when we realized that with two dogs, Ben and I...we had no room for Baby A. Thanks to Ben's incredible ability to make things happen, the move took place quickly.


Milo & Miko


Ben and me.

This move has brought a lot of anticipation. And, boy, oh, boy, am I excited! Because you KNOW what that means?!?!?! Let the DECORATING BEGIN! *happy sigh* We moved into this adorable space:

I have already made so many plans...allow me the SHEER pleasure to explain what is up my sleeve. Let's start with the stairwell. Because my art collection has grown (quickly), the amount of windows in the living room and dining room will limit where I put things. Or so I thought until I saw this post by Young House Love:

For the laundry room, I'm drooling over this:

To get this beauty: go here.

I am planning to make my own shower curtain using this AWESOME fabric -

Ikea: ANNAMOA Fabric

There are a couple of things I want to finish before I give you the grand tour - but that will be coming! So, stay tuned.

For the Love of Milo and Miko...

2011-03-31T21:10:00.000-04:00

I want to show Milo and Miko JUST how much I love them. So, what better way (in my eyes) than to have a Custom Watercolor Pet Portrait made of my two lovable pups? While I'm sure that they would much better prefer treats and toys and other dog-obsessions, I'm thinking this will better match the decor of my home.

Mothball Charlie

Baby A - Week 9

2011-03-30T13:26:00.000-04:00

This week, I have a lot to discuss. Oh my, I hope you are ready!

My Baby's Daddy: Ben has been incredible. I mean, he is always wonderful, but he has taken his wonderfulness to a whole new level. This week alone he has - cleaned the house, washed dishes, cleaned up dog poop, did all the laundry, arranged for our move (details to come soon!), cleaned up more poop, and has put up with my exhaustion, panic, and more. He has been splendid.

Maternity Clothes: I'll admit it. I'm not liking what I've seen so far. So, it is distressing for me to realize that mass maternity clothing arena is trying to force the whole "mom-look" on me. I'm not buying it. At all. Literally and figuratively. Needless to say, when Cindy takes me shopping...I hope she is prepared for the bundle of emotions called her grandchild's mom.

The absence of my Mom: I could write an entire blog about this, but I'm not. Let it suffice to say that I miss my Mom's insight like crazy, but that my dad has been wonderful in answering all my genetic questions and a great group of friends (Jamie, Lisa, in particular) have been wonderful support in making me feel more normal.

I get paranoid. In the middle of my excitement, my processing, my planning, I get paranoid. I get paranoid of what I'm eating - will I birth a "15 pound baby" due to my diet? (That is not a comforting thought). I get paranoid about a lot of things. But, I'm learning to take things one day at a time. And, that is difficult for me. The daily, YES DAILY, change of my body and smells and cravings and more leave me stressed out. But, I'm learning to relax.

Thank you all so much for your encouragement and just all around incredible comments! My energy is lacking - hence the silence, but I miss you all a lot, readers, so I'm trying to make a come-back. Plus, we have a ton to discuss too! Stay tuned!

Baby A - PS!

2011-03-23T21:16:00.000-04:00

As a follow-up to yesterday's blog, I TOTALLY forgot to mention a couple of things. Within 48 hours of finding out we were expecting, one of my friends said to me - "You are a planner. And, you just haven't had time to do some blog-stalking of baby things and mommy stuff." Then, of course, proceeded to tell me about a great blog.
Truer words were never spoken. And, that my friends, is the mark of a true friend, right there!

Here are a couple of blogs I enjoy tremendously. They are all written by Moms, but they show a lot of grace, patience and the reality of raising children.

Little Band of Brothers

Mrs. Priss

Warky Mom

I also have been really into this INCREDIBLE website - On To Baby ....sooooo many fabulous nursery ideas, maternity session ideas and more.

On of the things I've been researching is Maternity Sessions. I KNOW I want to have a photography session showin' off my big, glamorous preggo belly. But I also know I want something unique...hence the research. I haven't found or figured out EXACTLY what I want, but I'm getting closer and closer! Especially with photographers out there like Ashley Bee.

Baby A - Week 8

2011-03-22T07:34:00.000-04:00

This week, Ben and I had the pleasure of hearing Baby A's heartbeat. I think up to that point, I really didn't think I was pregnant for real. But the moment we heard the heartbeat....Ben and I both realized: this is for real. We are going to be parents.

Food Cravings have gotten interesting, lately. Someone asked me if I was "craving Chinese food at 3am?" Well, nooooo.....but that doesn't mean I'm NOT craving weird foods.

Doughnuts - I hate them. But 2 weeks ago, I ate an entire box. It was sickening. Plus, I still hate them.
Salads and French Fries - Love this combo. In fact, I need them NOW.
Nachos - Yummy.
Spaghetti at 10pm - Why not?
Broccoli with pizza - That make the pizza healthy, right?
Blue icing in Birthday Cake Ice Cream

Milo and Miko: Our little dogs don't have a clue what is going on. Although, I have noticed Milo is getting a bit more clingy than usual. They are noticing that I have pushed them off the bed in the middle of the night, flipped out (also in the middle of the night) when they touch me or brush my stomach. The poor dogs.

In other news: My clothes are getting tighter. My nausea has left. I'm forgetting things. I had my first baby dream. My body aches. My energy is gone. My desire to sleep has increased dramatically. My lack of sleep has been over-powering. (And, I'm already begging for a body pillow.) I wake up at 2-3am from vivid weird (sometimes terrifying) dreams.

And, to top it off - I will be 6 months pregnant in my sister's wedding. If you thought measuring for a bridesmaid dress was terrifying enough...imagine measuring for one NOW for when you are 6 months. OMG.

All in all, I'm beginning to fall in love with this little squirmy child in my tummy. November needs to hurry up and get here.

Creeper: Some Blog Lovin' (part 2)

2011-03-17T06:43:00.000-04:00

Well, it is another additional where I reveal who my biggest creepers are! Since we last played this fun game, my known readers have grown to 35 AND I've had several lurkers reveal themselves.

Where you are coming from:
Twitter and Facebook! I LOVE THIS. I am addicted to both, so this is a wonderful thing!

Baby A generated OVER 10 comments. Way to make Baby A feel so loved. And, have me wondering if this preggo thing should have happened sooner...FOR THE SAKE OF MY BLOG! (I am joking, of course)

My other countries are expanding, let's welcome:
Ireland (Happy St. Patty's Day!)
Malaysia
Russia
Japan (still praying for you all)
Jordan
France
Indonesia
Thailand
And, of course, the grand USA

Fan Mail: I recently got the BEST letter ever. It made my entire day. Read below.
"You may or may not remember me from college but your blog shows up on my [facebook] news feed every once in a while and I love reading it! I have a thing for blogs the past year or so I like to read lots of them when I have time haha. Congratulations on your pregnancy! Wishing you the best"

That was heartwarming and heart-melting. So, lurkers, it is time for you to reveal yourself again! Keep on reading, faithful readers, YOU GUYS MAKE MY HEART SO HAPPY!

Finally!

2011-03-16T21:15:00.000-04:00

I am SOOOOOO pleased to announce that Emily won on the Bachelor. I was absolutely THRILLED for more than one reason. Beyond the fact that I thought she was the PERFECT and ideal candidate for Brad...and she was so cute and genuine...I had given Reality TV an ultimatum. My dilemma with Reality TV has been that NO ONE I like and so strongly support wins. It drives me insane. Let's review:

Bachelor: Jake and Vienna. Need I say more? I was so upset when Vienna won. WHY?!?!
Michael from the Biggest Loser. Um, WHY DID HE NOT WIN?
Bachelorette: Ali did not select Chris. Argh.

So, basically, this was the last straw. Really. I was going to select new shows if Emily did not win. But luckily. Emily won. I'm satisfied. Life is good. :)

Speaking of favorites....are there subjects I write about that you enjoy reading about more than others? I don't want YOU to give me an ultimatum! (haha) Keeping in mind, Ben and Baby A will continue to be popular subjects for me, but I do want to make sure I'm writing things YOU are interested in. Speak to me. Tell me.

Baby A - Week 7

2011-03-15T07:45:00.002-04:00

This week, Baby A, Ben and I encounter some very interesting things.

One of Baby A's aunts went shopping. This was the perfect beginning of Baby A's intro to the world.

We determined the exact colors of Baby A's room all inspired by a BOOKMARK(special thanks to my bestie Stephanie):

We committed to purchasing Baby A's FIRST piece of furniture. I know, I know. 7 weeks into it and I've bought furniture. But, anyone who knows me KNOWS I'm a planner. Yep, and just like the moment I met Ben, I knew this dresser was the "one".

And, because I believe education is KEY. I bought this wonderful book recommended by my Doctor. In one week, it has been an incredible resource.

http://windsorpeak.com/expecting411/products-page/single-copies/expecting-411/

Of course, I have to give Ben credit. He has been wonderful...gently reminding me that I'm using my "preggo brain", dealing with my moments of freak out, and bringing me all the variety of food I could want to keep the nausea down. He is a good man.

That's all...'til next week!

Incredible Photography

2011-03-14T18:51:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite photographers is a girl I went to college with, Kate Gazaway. I love Kate's style, but I also love how much heart and soul each photograph has. In particular, Kate has been given incredible opportunities to travel the world and use her photography as an incredible resource to bring light to people whose stories will move your heart while breaking it at the same time.

I followed Kate on Twitter during her most recent adventure to Nicaragua. What was so incredible to me was that Kate spent her time teaching youth - with a wide age range - photography. I am eager to see the results. But, you can follow Picture Nicaragua on Facebook and also follow Kate's blog: http://ladykategazaway.tumblr.com/

What inspires you?

Alllll About Baby

2011-03-09T07:32:00.000-05:00

I should have seen it coming. Looking back, there were signs. But, it never occurred to me. Signs such as:
- On Sunday, I ate nachos. Made with BBQ pringles, cheese and salsa. It was wonderful. But, really, WHO DOES THAT?
- On Sunday, I cried over the Top Chef. Top Chef? Really? Tears?
- On Sunday, Ben asked me when I was suppose to have started my period. I didn't know. His calculation revealed I was 7 days late and I hadn't even noticed.

Those were the signs.

On Monday, I took a pregnancy test. It was positive. At 7:10am, I woke Ben up in a panic. "You have GOT to wake up." Monday was a daze.

On Tuesday, wee went to the doctor. And, when the doctor looked at Ben and said, "Congratulations, Dad." I looked at her and said, "How far along am I?" When she said 6 weeks, due the first of November. I was too shocked for words. I am 6 weeks pregnant and I didn't even know.

Funny things have taken place in the last 72 hours:
- The doctor tells us November 3rd and Ben begins to quote the movie V for Vendatta. "Remember, Remember the Fifth of November".
- The doctor asked me which hospital I planned on using. My response, "You just told me I was pregnant. I have no idea."
- My friend, Josh, tells me to "Shut Up." That was SUCH a Josh response and I loved it.
- My mother-in-law Cindy suggested it might just be twins.
- The non-stop starvation. OMG.

There will be owls. And, lots of them:

http://www.etsy.com/listing/62196758/owl-baby-nursey-art-personalized?ref=sr_list_26&ga_search_query=owls&ga_noautofacet=1&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_facet=handmade%2Fchildren

Owl Hats

Feeling Famous.

2011-03-05T10:00:00.001-05:00

In college, I participated in Students of AMF. While I wish my Mom was still here, the support of AMF was invaluable. Which is why I am so excited and honored to announce their new website:

www.studentsofamf.org

And, my story is on the front page. I am so excited about this because I truly hope it will encourage others and empower people, particularly college students, to reach out for help for their grief.

Sing To Me

2011-03-04T21:26:00.000-05:00

Ben and I are planning and talking about concerts we would like to attend. Much to my surprise, my list has become quite large.

That is my list. For now. Who do you want to see?

my sisters and me.

2011-03-01T20:40:00.000-05:00

Uncommonly Good People

2011-02-28T18:13:00.000-05:00

On Friday, I spent time with some great people. We are connected through my college where I graduated, but we have the ability to pick up where we left off....which is always a good thing. We laughed and talked and discussed and overall, conversation was comfortable. Easy. And, the silence was just as comfortable and easy.

Here are a couple things I want to share with you about what I observed -

1. Emily &Jake - are IN LOVE. I love seeing friends whose relationship evolved into love and now they are married. It was ADORABLE to see him glance at her...ALL THE FREAKING TIME. I love love.
2. Listening to student teachers Emily and Emily (yes, TWO Emilys!). Is it weird that as they talked about their classes, I automatically pictured the classrooms of Pretty Little Liars and Glee? Clearly, I need a life.
3. Good friends - Michael and Stephanie. They make my heart feel whole and complete. All those good memories - past and current that flood when I'm around them. I would have never married Ben without their approval. For real.
4. Nate and that kid I never caught your name - Shane? Sean? I'm not sure. Argh. But, I love their facial expressions and their antidotes. They may not have been the central "talkers", but they added a wonderful element to the conversation - the unexpected.

Oh, friends. I love friends.

PS - Emily of Emily and Jake - READS MY BLOG. Thank you, Emily.

A Series of Letters

2011-02-23T13:22:00.000-05:00

Sometimes, a letter just says what you need it to.

Dear Sick, Tired Body:
I promise you will get rest soon.

Dear Dead Valentine's Day Roses:
You are still here because I love the thought behind you too much to get rid of you. Thank you for adorning my coffee table with your ever-fading pose.

Dear Ben:
Thank you for curling up on the couch with me. I cherished our time together last night.

Dear Creativity:
I miss you too. I plan to make something soon. I promise.

Dear Miko:
Please stop peeing EVERYWHERE.

The end.

Valentine Day Highlights

2011-02-14T19:29:00.000-05:00

1. Owl City's song to Taylor Swift: http://owlcitymusic.com/vday/
Beautiful. And, by the way, I'm in love.
2. Jessica Claire is adding another title to her awesomeness - Mommy. I'll admit, I got teary-eyed.
3. Cooking dinner for Ben. (Did you really think I wouldn't squeeze his name in?!?)

how was your Valentine's Day?

Valentine's Day 2011

2011-02-14T18:43:00.001-05:00

If you've been following my blog for any length of time, you know that I think Ben is the best...in particular, the BEST at gifts and surprises and all around, making my life lovely. He definitely keeps getting better and better. No doubt about it. You also know - if you follow my blog - I'm kinda a go-big-or-go-home type of girl. I want the extravagant celebration, the incredible surprise, and the drain-your-wallet experience. No doubt about it.

Our anniversary is in December. December. In the midst of holidays, parties, friends, families, traditions, shopping, etc...we have to squeeze in "Don't-forget-to-celebrate-our-anniversary". That is exhausting. So, for our first anniversary, we split it up. We did part 1 (Nutcracker Ballet)...and this past weekend, we mixed in part 2 with Valentine's Day. Part 2 met my expectations, and definitely showed that once again, my man has got some SERIOUS skillz.

Part 2 = BAHAMAS.

We went on a cruise. Just Ben and I. For 3 days. It was fast, but it was needed. We had zero cell phone service (which I love!). A lot of time to talk. A lot of time to sleep. And, our personal favorite, (but you didn't hear it from me) a lot of time to people watch and people mock. It was glorious.

I was the ultimate tourist - I brought two cameras with me. Ben was the ultimate planner - we did a lot of fun things (Bahamas beach, fun restaurants, a little bit of time spent in the casino, hot tub, karaoke, trivia, bingo, fun shows, and good food). We had fun. It was relaxing. We laughed. We reconnected. We enjoyed no responsibilities.

Here are some pictures of our fun times:

(first set of pictures taken with my awesome Polariod Camera - another great gift from Ben!)

The sign that welcomed us.

A window-side view of our surroundings.

My attempt to play a slot machine. (Should brought a book! ha!)

Ben at the casino - he was actually really good. Who knew?!?

Our Cruise Countdown.

The Housewives of Nassau table. They were among our favorites to people-watch.

Old-school myspace mirror/formal picture.

The beautiful beach

The other couples we had dinner with each night - they were so much fun!

Our taxi ride to the beach.

The beach, the clear water - it was incredible.

The food was incredible. But, this is the only picture to show for it.

The end.

Our Family Is Growing!

2011-02-05T21:48:00.000-05:00

We are excited to announce that.....Milo is about to be a big brother!

We are welcoming Miko back to our family.

(and you thought it was a real (human) baby!)

Sometimes For Your Marriage...

2011-02-01T20:43:00.000-05:00

....you stay up 'til 3am to resolve differences.

Sometimes only because your love for your spouse surpasses your pride in being right.

This was Ben and I just last night. It made our marriage stronger and better...

Yes, I'm tired, but it was SO worth it.

Strengths Vs. Not-So-Strengths (Inspiration from Promise)

2011-01-29T11:28:00.000-05:00

Promise Tangeman - whom you all know I love - recently challenged her blog readers to talk about strengths and not-so-strengths (don't you love that she didn't call them WEAKNESSES?).
So, I thought I would post mine:

Strengths:
Creating
Communicating
Writing
Researching
Hard-worker
Cooking/Baking
Passionate
Encouraging
Making people feel like they matter (BECAUSE THEY DO!)

Not-So-Strengths:
Cleaning
Accounting/Finance/Budgets
Organization
Fear
Over-analyzation

Just because there aren't very many Not-So-Strengths does not mean they are any less important. All of the Not-So-Strengths are humbling. Very. I'm realizing how much of my life is a tug-of-war between dreaming and fear. On one hand, I'm a huge dreamer and I know exactly where I want to go and be in my life. On the other hand, I second-guess my ability (sometimes) to the point where I remain paralyzed in place. I'm currently learning and pushing forward to break the tug-of-war. In addition, I don't like cleaning and I can be organized but it takes a concentrated effort. Thank-goodness for Ben. Those are definite strengths of his and he helps me to be better.

Of course, the Strengths make me feel empowered and bold. Which is ironic because "bold" is the word of the week for me. I'm working hard to make my dreams reality and to worry about the "what-ifs" later. Feel free to share yours; I'd love to know your thoughts!

My Mother-in-law

2011-01-28T19:26:00.001-05:00

I'm being brave. I know my mother-in-law reads my blog. (Hi Cindy!)

I will be honest. I really struggled with the concept of Mother-in-law. Right after I lost my mom, I worked really hard to separate myself from any women close to my Mom's age. It was too difficult. Too painful. Too many memories. Too many "What Ifs".

Ben's Mom is so sweet. Everyone loves her. She loves and gives and helps so many people. She is generous with her time. To everyone around her. Our relationship in the first months of our (Ben and I's) relationship was rocky. In my opinion, my relationship with Cindy was rocky, mostly because of ME: my fears, my baggage, my issues. To be fair, a lot of my crazy, sporadic wedding planning dreams evolved into reality because of Cindy. She took on that wedding not as if it was her son getting married, but as if it was her own daughter getting married. I was very lucky. But, my fear continued to hold me back.

Over the last couple of months, I've changed. I think it was nothing short of giving myself permission. Permission to relax and establish a relationship with the woman who has seen Ben at his worst and lowest points; who raised two crazy boys by herself; a woman I am learning a lot about life from.

She makes me laugh. She makes me feel loved. She has given me survival tips for how to live to tell about Ben's "depression" if his team suffers a loss. She makes me feel like an equal. And, I'm learning how to trust.

But, more importantly, I am happy, thrilled even, to call Cindy my friend.

New Years Resolutions

2011-01-27T08:00:00.001-05:00

So, a week into the new year I FINALLY nailed down my New Years Resolution. I wanted to make sure that whatever my goals were that I actually stuck to them. And, of course, 4 weeks into the New Year, I'm sharing my New Years Resolution with you. Better late than never, right?

They are very simple.

1. Be creative and make something every week.
This year, I want to be able to look back and SEE the fruits of my labor. To see my creativity more fully developed. My goal is simple and so far I'm making GREAT progress. :)

2. Make going to the gym a habit.
I've already discussed this. I have nothing else to say about it. (But, you know that isn't entirely true...who am I kidding?)

3. Spend more time with Ben. I'm in love with that boy. I MUST soak up every single possible and available moment with that ~~lover of mine~~ him :)

Creeper: Some Blog Lovin'

2011-01-26T21:09:00.000-05:00

I love to creep. Is that weird that I just announced that? Well, I do. And, I definitely mean that in the best possible stay-out-of-jail way.I love blogs. I love facebook. I am constantly exploring new blogs (Hey - it's cheaper than shopping!). I love Facebook because I continually creep on all of my 500 + friends. It makes my heart happy. Truly.

Recently, I learned, that I am not the ONLY person who loves to creep...YOU do TOO! This made me so happy...only to weird me out to know that you are creeping on me.

I feel the love. A lot. Ha!

So, here are some fun Stats to show of just how creepy my readers REALLY are:
1. Number 1 referred site - FACEBOOK. This is FANTASTIC news. It means my friends are reading my blog!
2. Countries - I am proud to announce my blog is viewed internationally! Let's celebrate my readers from Canada, Brazil, Turkey, Indonesia, and the Philippines...and I will NOT leave out my faithful U.S. of A. readers.
3. Last month I had 899 views of my blog. That is incredible. But, RRRRRrrrreeeeeeaaaaaallllllyyyyyy, guys, you couldn't make it 900? REALLY? (haha...just kidding...sorta)

4. I've got a ton of lurkers. About every OTHER blog post or so, I get 1 comment. Friends, neighbors, visitors, readers...PLEASE comment. Talk to me. I'm begging you. From the bottom of my heart.

The Milo Shop: A Proper Introduction

2011-01-24T20:06:00.000-05:00

In my excitement to announce my Etsy shop, The Milo Shop, I kinda skipped over WHY I've opened up my own shop.

Over the past year, I have embraced creativity. I have embraced it with a growing boldness and a desire to do more work with my hands, textures, colors, and more. This has come out in different ways - decorating my home, adjusting my wardrobe, starting my blog, and now my Etsy store.

But there is more. I have a strong desire to work for myself, to own my own business, to turn my creativity into a business. This part has been extremely intimidating. I've spent so much time doing research, pouring over blogs, articles and more. But, my favorite resource? Etsy's Quit Your Day Job series. I L-O-V-E that series because it gives me hope...Hope that those series aren't for everyone else, but for me.

This is bold for me. This is taking a huge leap of faith. This is embracing the potential of my future. But I'm excited for the journey.

Do you feel like you are embracing your dreams? Do your dreams scare you? Do your dreams motivate you?

Gym: Version 2011

2011-01-21T08:00:00.001-05:00

So, the New Year brought a renewed commitment for Ben and I and the Gym.

Argh.

Why can't I just read and blog and craft and the pounds just shed? WHY?

Anyway, it has been a challenge for me. But, I am committed to it. For real.

Through all my anxiety of going to the gym, I love this sign:

Sign reads: Due to the damages caused on our equipment, proper workout attire is now required. This excludes denim shorts and pants, as well as khakis or anything with button and clasps. This will ensure longevity of our equipment. Thank you.

I love this sign. A lot. Mainly because there is this lady. She is about 60-65 years old. She is one of those work-out grandma types. You KNOW those types. I only ever see her ride the bike. Which is NOT a criticism - I ride the bike. But, she and I differ in our techniques of bike riding. I ride with shoes on. (You know, because it makes sense). She does not. She rides barefoot. Which is why I love this sign...I always wonder if she has ever read this sign?