Friday, June 25, 2010

Ways I K-N-O-W I'm Growing Old...

I just keep hoping it was passed down to me...The women in my Mom's family overflow with one distinctive trait: they age well.

I hope I have that trait. To be honest, the thought of growing old, gathering wrinkles that cling to my face, looking droopier than Eeyore...generally scares me half-to-death. This came up in a conversation recently, so I thought I would share some ways I KNOW I'm getting old.

(source)

1. When I find ONE gray hair and I ask Ben if he'll still love me. Then I contemplate dying my hair...NOW. Ignorance is bliss, you know.

2. When we hang out with friends and by 10:00pm, I'm begging Ben to take me home. Because "I CAN'T keep my eyes open for ONE MORE MOMENT."

3. When Ben and I have this conversation:
Me: I'm thinking about getting botox.
Ben: HAHAHA!!! Yeah. right.
(Ben looks at me. I stare blankly at him. His eyes grow wide)
Ben: You are serious. (notice this is a statement, not a question)
Me: Yeah. I am.
(Ben then proceeds to make fun of me by doing a one-sided-stiff-face-conversation.)

4. When I don't want Ben to squeeze my face because it may cause wrinkles, I stand in the beauty aisle in stores looking at Anti-Wrinkle Cream.
 
5. I read fashion magazines.
(to gather tips of how to disguise my body's imperfections with clothes...I'm sure you wants me to share, right? SORRY! That is why they are called SECRET beauty tips.)

In-spite of all this...I guess I really shouldn't be too worried. I still get asked if I just graduated from highschool. 

2 comments:

  1. I couldn't believe nobody made a comment on this hilarious blog post so I thought I would make your day. I love you honey!!! You may be an oldie, but you are still a goody!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. You are SOOOOOO now an oldie!!!!!!!!!!!!! And, this blog made me laugh aloud by the way :)

    ReplyDelete

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